Any advice (men or women) about maintaining a sugarbaby relationship?

[MBS550]

Just met a very potential sugarbaby that's in dire need of financial help and is very vulnerable right now. This is my first time doing something like this so I don't know what the protocol is. It sounds like she wants to date for companionship and also make money at the same time. We had our first date the other day and she's already asking me if I want to hang out today and on the weekend. When do I start helping her financially? How long do I take to get to know her? Is she expecting me to give her a little something to show my commitment first? What kind of donation is expected for the first offering? Any help here would be appreciated either from men or women about this and anything in general I should know.

Thanks.

[Whispers]

Seems like the two of you should talk.

ABout her needs and expectations vs your desires and willingness to help.

It's a business arrangement first. Get that out of the way and then have fun.

[Reya Sunshine]

This is one of those rare cases where I agree with whispers. Also, it sounds like your lucky day...this girl must be new to the scene if you already spent some intimate time together and the money situation hasn't been ironed out.

[levibob56]

I think you sould give me her # and let me work out a plan for you! Just kidding!!
Talk and set the gound rules. Have a dollar amount in your head that you will not go past then ask her what she thinks is fair for 1 or 2 times a week, month ...? Then work it out!

[Sexy Roxanne]

Looking outside to see if pigs are flying....I do agree with Wisphers.

[Baloney Pony]

Originally Posted by MBS550

What kind of donation is expected for the first offering?

Howdy, Folks!


Well...you may have already made a substantial one.


Does she know your real name?

Does she know your telephone #?

Does she know where you live?

Does she know where you work?

Does she know anything else about you that can identify you as you?

If so - she has the most valuable commodity I know: information.


Depending on how "vulnerable" and how "dire" her "need of financial help" is, be very, very careful about what you give her besides cash.



This is one of the very big reasons I eschew the sugardaddy situation, and stick with providers in the Hobby - the arrangement is *so* much more clear cut, and for a professional Provider, generally her reputation is not worth sullying by playing petty blackmail games for a short term gain.

Good luck to you, and go into this very much using the big head and keep your eyes very wide open!

[Guest102312]

Well you should definetly start with building trust. Make sure that the both of you know what each other's expectations are ahead of time to eliminate drama later. When you see her bring her a "gift". Dont ever put money and sex in the same sentence.....unlike providers she will not see the legal side of things but more of a respect thing.

Ask her to be completely honest and tell you what all she is having issues with and explain to her that you are helping her get on her feet and not to be treated like an atm machine.

With this type of arrangement it is usually to help the other person finacially to stand on their own two feet and be able to support themselves.

I hope that helps.....MUAH!!!

[Rand Al'Thor]

Originally Posted by MBS550

Just met a very potential sugarbaby that's in dire need of financial help and is very vulnerable right now. This is my first time doing something like this so I don't know what the protocol is. It sounds like she wants to date for companionship and also make money at the same time. We had our first date the other day and she's already asking me if I want to hang out today and on the weekend. When do I start helping her financially? How long do I take to get to know her? Is she expecting me to give her a little something to show my commitment first? What kind of donation is expected for the first offering? Any help here would be appreciated either from men or women about this and anything in general I should know.

Thanks.

Set clear boundaries. I don't know your situation or how you met her, but it sounds like she's into you somewhat... As has been mentioned, talk. Understand her needs, then get a feel for what she's willing to give or do. Don't take her to the limits of what she's willing, back off from that limit a bit. You should come out of the negotiation part feeling as though both have gained from it.

This is the tricky part with meeting a sugar baby who is in dire need. You don't want her to feel like you are taking advantage of her, but you also shouldn't put yourself out on a limb. If she needs a large sum of money up front, you should be very wary of the situation. Do not feel obligated to meet her needs, if it makes you uncomfortable. If you trust her and feel OK with advancing the money, make it clear what your expectations are for this.

I usually set clear "rules" on how things will work and set expectations for both parties. I travel quite a bit, if I'm out of town, she can expect the same amount of money that I give as "allowance", but the number of sessions will accrue and we will catch up when I'm back in town. She will make honest attempts to accommodate me, as I have advanced her allowances while I was out of town to ensure that her income is stable. She is responsible for her finances, any emergencies, unforseen expenses will not be taken care of me. If she wants me to take care of them, we will make a separate deal on top of the existing one.

As for your side... If this is something you would like as a long term arrangement, say what you will do, and do what you say you will. Biggest complaints I hear from SBs are that SDs are flakes. Of course, this doesn't keep them from being flakes, but keeping up your side of the bargain means that they will trust you and will not fear dealing with you again. This should be the way you deal regardless of if you intend on making this long term or short term, but it needs to be mentioned for some.

[E2]

Originally Posted by Whispers

It's a business arrangement first. Get that out of the way and then have fun.

Originally Posted by Rand Al'Thor

Set clear boundaries. .

A good business relationship / contract is clarified on your best day in anticipation of your worst day. Hopefully the worst day will not come, but be prepared.

[Yssup Rider]

Best advice I could give you is: RUN. FAR! FAST!

I wouldn't presume to judge, but you need to study "The Sopranos!"

I also agree that E2 speaks with wisdom. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

Best way to eliminate the worst is NOT TO PLAY. Great providers who you can "take care of" for an hour at a time and there's an excellent chance you won't have to worry about them calling your SO, Boss, Clients or God knows who else when you piss them off.

[Amrita Lover]

Think about what your monthly budget is and divide it by the number of times you would like to hang out and have fun. Then just give her the donation each time you see her. Its an over simplified plan, for sure, but might be the basis for an agreement.

[Rand Al'Thor]

Originally Posted by Amrita Lover

Think about what your monthly budget is and divide it by the number of times you would like to hang out and have fun. Then just give her the donation each time you see her. Its an over simplified plan, for sure, but might be the basis for an agreement.

Well, I like negotiation, and take a bit of pride in finding cheap sessions. Finding out her needs tends to give you a good starting point to negotiate from. Taking your budget and dividing by the number of times you want to see her would take away other options... Starting from the other end, her needs, has yielded me much better results.

[Whispers]

I prefer also to let them be the ones invested waiting on a return....

I demonstrate in some manner my ability as well as willingness to play...... Then I set up expectations that need to be met for her needs to be met.....

i.e.... I'll pay her rent at the beginning of the month provider she spends X amount of time with me THIS month..... Prior to that I've handled a couple of immediate needs for immediate sessions.....

The girls I have arrangements with could stop seeing me tomorrow and I would be ahead of the game financially.....

[harkontume]

Beware of this one:

" You dont have too , I understand but I am short xxxx for rent because of xxxx. If you could see your way to advance xxxx it would help."

usually a couple of months into it.

[Guest060211-3]

you seek master yoda's advice on the SB TOPIC.

IMHO the source is rand al thor