I've dabbled in the SB/SD in the past. Mostly due to my extensive travels for work. My profile stated my expectations/guidelines.
In general I offered a start up package:
$100 first meeting at coffee shop of their choice
$100 second meeting casual dining place of their choice
$300 drinks at location of their choice, followed by private time
This gave me 3 chances to see if they looked like their profile, could show up on time, and they hold a convo.
If not, either of us could stop at any of the three steps.
Next step was a weekly test.
Negotiated rate after date 3 if we agreed we clicked. Paid on first contact each week. I wanted 1 public meal and/or drinks, plus one private visit per week M-Th, no time limits, no weekends. (I went home Fri-Sun)
If that went well for a month, then next steps negotiation. Half month on first visit of month, rest paid on 3rd week that included a full overnight.
Third month, negotiate full month with same weekly requirement plus the overnight.
Fourth month, added a getaway weekend. Mutual review every 3 months after that for any renegotiations.
Most SB candidates never made it past meet 1, let alone month 1.
Of the 3 that did make it to full monthly up front:
1. In AZ, I was there for 6 months that aligned with her final 6 months of college. She graduated moved to San Diego, my project completed, went back home. I learned I love a woman that has Yogi certification and it started by me sitting at a bar and saying to the woman next to me, "It looks like your friends dragged you somewhere you don't want to be either. Want to grab a bite and talk about how they don't understand? They'll think we found somebody and leave us alone." She agreed and we left. Still miss that time, but it was a perfect situation.
2. In Dallas, met initially via legit massage. Saw her pic on a SB site after. Mentioned it at next massage and told her my plan above during massage. She agreed to try. 8 months later project was closing out, called her and told her it was going to be my last visit on 1st of month but she'd still get full month payment. She said to keep my money and just go home, if we met she'd break a rule (don't say love) and she'd rather not have to cry in front of me. To be honest, I may have relocated and worked from Dallas if she asked, so probably a good time to break it off. She has since joined Suicide Girls touring group and been in a couple of indie films. Still keep track because she was just awesome overall.
3. In OK, friend of my dog groomer (met her picking up my dog). She was needing temporary help after an abusive relationship and was couch surfing with groomer at the moment. I offered her dinner, we met, explained what I could do and ground rules and moved forward. After our first weekend getaway, I get a message saying I needed to double our arrangement fees or she'd tell my boss. Told her if she wasn't happy with allowance, I'd be happy to renegotiate early and what was she willing to do for doubling the allowance. "Stay quiet" was her only offer. I passed on her offer. She messaged my boss, told my boss she was a delusional groomer. She started hunting down family, told them same thing. Got a restraining order on her, then she was jailed for drunken and disorderly and DWI. She used her 1 call from jail asking for bail and forgiveness. Told her no thanks but contacted my groomer friend so she'd know where to find he. Friend bailed her, but she skipped bail. I was told she was found living in New Orleans with a drug dealer and in prison now. Evidently when she wasn't with me, she was just a junky and that abusive relationship was her previous dealer. She cleaned up nice and had me and her friend fooled that she was on the right path. Had she stayed clean, she would have been an amazing human being. She was so close, full time job, car, apartment of her own. She just needed to stay on the path, but fell harder than anybody could help.
So none of them were via contact through a SD/SB site, just happenstance.
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My Bio Page - Texas - Dallas
