For Christmas, she wants an appointment. Really?

[Guests021916]

Well, I recently took a lady to get a mani/pedi We sat in chairs beside each other and I got my toes done as well. It was a first for me and it was fun. We laughed a lot and got the shop girls tickled as well. We went to lunch afterwards. Your feet feel really good by the way...

[citizen33]

Last Christmas I bought a provider one of the big boxes of magnums...put a bow on it.....and told her merry Christmas now you shouldn't run out lol.....was getting tired of having to pick them up before every appt. Lol.

[Sir Lancehernot]

Thanks to (almost) everyone who provided their thoughts.

I wasn't looking for alternative gift ideas as much as I was expressing some degree of incredulity at her suggestion that an appointment was an appropriate gift. To me, there doesn't seem to be anything special about showing up on December 2X, with $XXX in an envelope, and spending an hour doing what she's already done once or twice that day and several times that week. (If I'd ever known a woman who thought that my dick in her mouth was an appropriate gift, I'd've married her. )

I deliberately left out some context so that I wouldn't foreclose any possible responses, even those that for sure don't, probably don't, or may not apply.

I'm reasonably certain, for example, that she would not view a gift as inappropriate. And, though I don't like making suppositions about financial need in the absence of more evidence, frankly, the idea that she might need the appointment to help make ends meet or to fund her own Christmas giving really never crossed my mind.

Originally Posted by bored@home

Perhaps you are over thinking it. Maybe she just wants your company. To you Xmas is a gift giving holiday and it is seared into your thought process that gifts have to be tangible items and to her maybe company (in whatever form) is more precious.

I probably am overthinking; omakase thinks so, too. bored@home, good point I think there really is an element in there. OTOH ...

Originally Posted by davidfree986

I totally disagree with that. If a provider just wants a hobbyists company, then he should not have to pay for her time ..

On to this:

Originally Posted by doug_dfw

Seems to me the OP misses the point. You ask your SO what she wants, generally because prior surprises were not appreciated.

No, you ask your SO what she wants because after 30 years of tying to make sure she's safe and happy, you're completely out of ideas for things that 1) won't be forgotten in five days and 2) might bring a smile of genuine happiness to her face.

You ask your special friends-for-an-hour what they want because you have spent more time having sex with them than getting to know them.

Make your best guess, be romantic in giving, and a surprise. You will be surprised by the appreciation. Providers are women first and foremost. Remember, it is the thought that counts. Not the magnitude.

This is more in line with the answer I would expect a woman to provide.

One other thing to think about: I'm sure she will be inundated with gifts. Maybe she just wants one less thing to have to dispose of after the holidays.

[Eva Damita]

Originally Posted by diddleman

Well, I recently took a lady to get a mani/pedi We sat in chairs beside each other and I got my toes done as well. It was a first for me and it was fun. We laughed a lot and got the shop girls tickled as well. We went to lunch afterwards. Your feet feel really good by the way...

You and I would have a ball, I was at the nail tech's yesterday ! I live for mani/pedis, as many ladies do.

A remarkable idea, and SirLance can treat himself too!

To Sir, very thoughtful of you for even considering her for the holidays...she must be one special lady.

[ElisabethWhispers]

Originally Posted by omakase

OP's a romantic. His questions always amuse me because it seems that he's yearning for a deeper meaning. Probably a mean thing to say but it's been a rough morning so I feel snarky.

(1) It's not even Halloween so why bother with Christmas yet? You should focus on the more immediate holidays.

(2) How new is this ATF? I doubt that she'd answer that question the way she did if you were a regular. Until you've qualified for her elite status, you're in the economy class.

(3) Again, why are you planning a session that's 2 1/2 months away? Isn't there some movie rule that you don't set up dates further than you've known the person?

Women are constantly barraged with men who are generally just wishing to play games about dates WAY in the future. When I was newer, I would spend months dealing with these guys to only have them not follow through when the time came.

Not suggesting that this is you but she doesn't know your true intentions. When I read this, I think of a dangling carrot and it's comes across as a little manipulative. Again, I'm sure this isn't your intent but she doesn't know your true inner feelings.

If a close friend of mine asked about a Christmas gift during the month of October, especially a newer one, I would feel skeptical and probably not say too much.

And that's me. I'm wordy on a good day and I LOVE LOVE LOVE getting gifts but for a question like that, SO far in advanced, I would feel wary (would try to not show it) and suggest something fairly non-committal.

I liked what omakese wrote. It's too much of a loaded question for early in October.

[Sir Lancehernot]

Somehow, an impression has developed that I haven't known her for very long.

Elizabeth, would your answer change of it were someone you had been seeing regularly for three years?

[ElisabethWhispers]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

Somehow, an impression has developed that I haven't known her for very long.

Elizabeth, would your answer change of it were someone you had been seeing regularly for three years?

Oh, completely. Yes, I thought that she was someone that you barely knew.

My apologies. Not sure why I got that impression.

If this was a question from a friend/client that I knew for years, I would be extremely flattered and give the question the thought that it deserved.

And then, I would be excited about it!!! (Still might have a bit of nagging doubt in the back of my head about "will this really happen" but that's just me!)

Hugs,
EW

[Tickle]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

I was asking a lady recently what I might get her for Christmas.

She said she couldn't think of anything and said if I wanted to give her something, I could make an appointment.

My perspective was, "Seriously? I'd like to do something special -- within my means, which I admit are rather modest compared to some of your other clients -- and the best gift you can think of is basically another day at the office, the same old in-and-out, just one of two or three other appointments you'll do that day?"

I think Christmas is special, and I wrack my brain for months trying to figure out good gifts for the people on my list. An appointment seems so ordinary, common, mundane, pedestrian (not for me, but certainly for her).

Other perspectives?

Christmas is such a shitty commercialized holiday, who honestly gives a fuck about it that doesn't still piss the bed?

If you want to do something special for one of these girls just do it, you don't need some shitty Mc Holiday to do it m8.

[Sir Lancehernot]

Thanks for that positive, informative, and enlightening contribution! Merry Christmas to you and Mrs. Scrooge!

[Tickle]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

Thanks for that positive, informative, and enlightening contribution! Merry Christmas to you and Mrs. Scrooge!

If you want to stand out in the crowd (You do, don't you?) Don't do birthday gifts, don't do Valentines, don't do Christmas or Mother's day. Every fool with a dick will try to capitalize on some browny points when one of these Mc Holidays pops up. And most likely she won't even be using her real birthday (I bet some of these girls have birthdays every few weeks.) Instead, do something on a random Monday. I'm not talking about showing up uninvited naked with a banjo type spontaneous, keep it classy and professional, but spontaneous, and slightly random out of the blue. It's more appreciated if it isn't expected/suspected. I was trying to help you out, but if Corporate America has you tooled into the Christmas idea, well.

[syeira pink]

Originally Posted by diddleman

Well, I recently took a lady to get a mani/pedi We sat in chairs beside each other and I got my toes done as well. It was a first for me and it was fun. We laughed a lot and got the shop girls tickled as well. We went to lunch afterwards. Your feet feel really good by the way...

That would be freaking awesome. I'm jealous.

[EZ.]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

Somehow, an impression has developed that I haven't known her for very long.

Elizabeth, would your answer change of it were someone you had been seeing regularly for three years?

Obviously, I'm not Elizabeth but that is more reason that she feels you are crossing the line. This is about sex ...nothing more.

I don't understand the ATF thing. I might pick one after I have seen them all.

[Sir Lancehernot]

Originally Posted by OldLRRP

This is about sex ...nothing more.

For you, perhaps. WALDT.

If what some ladies have told me is true, you'd be surprised at the number of clients who are content to spend their hour just conversing. (No, I'm not in that number.)

I really can't see how it is out of line to give a gift to someone with whom you have a valued relationship, whether it's for sex only, whether it's a business relationship, or whether it's a personal relationship. As some of the ladies have who have chimed in have indicated, they enjoy receiving such gestures of appreciation. If it gives me pleasure to give, and she enjoys and appreciates the gift, why not?

[oldbutstillgoing]

Sir Lancehernot, There is nothing wrong with wanting to do something nice for someone you know, especially for years. There are many valid points here. Yes, your a customer first, not a long lost lover. Yes, some women may feel awkward accepting a gift from a client. There are some very real boundaries that need to be respected for everyone's benefit. Crossing them has led to many problems for both sides. Some guys see no point to giving a gift. After all, you did just pay here.


All that said, many people give gifts for the pleasure of doing something nice for someone else. Maybe she does not care/given any thought to it or she is trying to show you one of those lines. Some gals may feel pressure to give in return and that makes them uncomfortable.

In any case, if you want to give, do so. But keep it small and simple. A card with a bonus. A bottle of her favorite beverage. A gift card to a store she might like to shop at. Keep it modest. Something you might take to a Xmas party for a gift exchange. Maybe $20 or under as a guideline if not giving cash. Something that says "Thank You" but wont put pressure on her or make her think you may be getting too close to her.

I have given gifts to valued customers, venders, providers, and friends for years. Its a nice way to say you value that relationship no matter what the basis is.

Your appear to be a gentleman. Don't let the nay-sayers here make you feel bad for wanting to do something nice

[EZ.]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

For you, perhaps. WALDT.

If what some ladies have told me is true, you'd be surprised at the number of clients who are content to spend their hour just conversing. (No, I'm not in that number.)

I really can't see how it is out of line to give a gift to someone with whom you have a valued relationship, whether it's for sex only, whether it's a business relationship, or whether it's a personal relationship. As some of the ladies have who have chimed in have indicated, they enjoy receiving such gestures of appreciation. If it gives me pleasure to give, and she enjoys and appreciates the gift, why not?

I'm retired but I have a business. Come Christmas time, I will be buying gifts for some of those that do business with me. I would feel odd if one bought a gift for me. They show their appreciation, each month, when they pay the invoices.

Like anyone else I know, I've done favors for providers. I've helped out in many different ways. Just recently, I had one of the girls having trouble with a business. It was a situation where I have a lot of expertise. I coached her on how to deal with them and it saved her about $1000. I consider it just human decency. I would not feel comfortable giving that same girl a gift. I would be afraid that she might misinterpret my intentions.