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02-25-2010, 09:16 AM
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#31
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Making Pussy Great Again
Join Date: Jan 4, 2010
Location: In your closet, in your head...
Posts: 16,091
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Who Won?????????????????????
The suspense is killing me!
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 09:26 AM
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#32
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Not A Stepford Wife
User ID: 14483
Join Date: Feb 14, 2010
Location: Decatur Denton♀️ Dallas Midland
Posts: 8,105
My ECCIE Reviews
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I will announce the winner tomorrow...
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 10:59 AM
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#33
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Dec 24, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,143
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If I'm not the winner, I'll know it was rigged. I should know what my boobs look like and nobody's telling me any different.
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 12:49 PM
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#34
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Gaining Momentum
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 53
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2 soon
Carl, it's too soon for your pussy to be doing a victory dance!
Sounds like we will all know soon. Can't wait.
Good luck everyone.
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 01:13 PM
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#35
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Dec 24, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,143
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It's not a victory dance. I'm in rehab going through detox. I was/am addicted to pussy. That's why i look like I do. You are what you eat. The worst thing about getting the shakes is I used to be able to kick ass at Jenga. Not anymore.
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 01:16 PM
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#36
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Making Pussy Great Again
Join Date: Jan 4, 2010
Location: In your closet, in your head...
Posts: 16,091
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Try the blue water......
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 01:20 PM
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#37
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Dec 24, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,143
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Cats and water don't get along. Try giving a cat a bath. Get some body armor and plenty of gauze first.
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 01:34 PM
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#38
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Apr 14, 2009
Posts: 2,043
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I think they are your boobs,Reece McClain
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 01:48 PM
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#39
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Making Pussy Great Again
Join Date: Jan 4, 2010
Location: In your closet, in your head...
Posts: 16,091
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It's just like taking a pill. Here kitty, kitty
HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL - Sit on sofa. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your elbow as though you were going to give a bottle to a baby. Talk softly to it.
- With right hand, position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. (be patient) As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. Drop pill into mouth. Let go of cat, noticing the direction it runs.
- Pick the pill up off the floor and go get the cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. Sit on floor in kitchen, wrap arm around cat as before, drop pill in mouth. Let go of cat, noticing the direction it runs.
- Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Scoot across floor to pick up pill, and go find the cat. Bring it back into the kitchen. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. Drop pill into mouth.
- Pry claws from back legs out of your arm. Go get the cat, pick up half-dissolved pill from floor and drop it into garbage can.
- Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of closet. Call spouse from backyard. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
- Retrieve cat from curtain rod, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered Doulton figures from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
- Get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
- Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
- Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.
- Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
- Call fire department to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take another pill from foil wrap.
- Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, force cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour one cup of water down throat to wash pill down.
- Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call at furniture shop on way home to order new table.
- Get last pill from bottle. Go into bathroom and get a fluffy towel. Stay in the bathroom with the cat, and close the door.
- Sit on bathroom floor, wrap towel around kitty, leaving only his head exposed. Cradle kitty in the crook of your arm, and pick up pill off of counter.
- Retrieve cat from top of shower door (you didn't know that cats can jump 5 feet straight up in the air, did you?), and wrap towel around it a little tighter, making sure its paws can't come out this time. With fingers at either side of its jaw, pry it open and pop pill into mouth. Quickly close mouth (his, not yours).
- Sit on floor with cat in your lap, stroking it under the chin and talking gently to it for at least a half hour, while the pill dissolves.
- Unwrap towel, open bathroom door. Wash off scratches in warm soapy water, comb your hair, and go find something to occupy your time for 7-1/2 hours.
- Arrange for SPCA to get cat and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
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02-25-2010, 08:18 PM
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#40
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 114
Join Date: Mar 27, 2009
Location: Houston Texas
Posts: 618
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boardman
HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL - Sit on sofa. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your elbow as though you were going to give a bottle to a baby. Talk softly to it.
- With right hand, position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. (be patient) As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. Drop pill into mouth. Let go of cat, noticing the direction it runs.
- Pick the pill up off the floor and go get the cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. Sit on floor in kitchen, wrap arm around cat as before, drop pill in mouth. Let go of cat, noticing the direction it runs.
- Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Scoot across floor to pick up pill, and go find the cat. Bring it back into the kitchen. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. Drop pill into mouth.
- Pry claws from back legs out of your arm. Go get the cat, pick up half-dissolved pill from floor and drop it into garbage can.
- Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of closet. Call spouse from backyard. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
- Retrieve cat from curtain rod, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered Doulton figures from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
- Get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
- Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
- Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.
- Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
- Call fire department to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take another pill from foil wrap.
- Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, force cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour one cup of water down throat to wash pill down.
- Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call at furniture shop on way home to order new table.
- Get last pill from bottle. Go into bathroom and get a fluffy towel. Stay in the bathroom with the cat, and close the door.
- Sit on bathroom floor, wrap towel around kitty, leaving only his head exposed. Cradle kitty in the crook of your arm, and pick up pill off of counter.
- Retrieve cat from top of shower door (you didn't know that cats can jump 5 feet straight up in the air, did you?), and wrap towel around it a little tighter, making sure its paws can't come out this time. With fingers at either side of its jaw, pry it open and pop pill into mouth. Quickly close mouth (his, not yours).
- Sit on floor with cat in your lap, stroking it under the chin and talking gently to it for at least a half hour, while the pill dissolves.
- Unwrap towel, open bathroom door. Wash off scratches in warm soapy water, comb your hair, and go find something to occupy your time for 7-1/2 hours.
- Arrange for SPCA to get cat and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
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OMG,, this is so true... I have the nicest little kitty until I have to give him a pill,, he then turns into the Tasmanian devil/ human shredder.
Can't wait to see who the winner is!
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 08:23 PM
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#41
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Gaining Momentum
Join Date: Feb 18, 2010
Location: Depends
Posts: 76
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What Kitty are you all talking about?
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 08:33 PM
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#42
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 31, 2009
Location: Houston ,Texas
Posts: 6,890
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Carl
It's not a victory dance. I'm in rehab going through detox. I was/am addicted to pussy. That's why i look like I do. You are what you eat. The worst thing about getting the shakes is I used to be able to kick ass at Jenga. Not anymore.
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You're like Boardman you try to hard to be funny and you're not.
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 08:40 PM
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#43
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 114
Join Date: Mar 27, 2009
Location: Houston Texas
Posts: 618
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Twist of Fate
What Kitty are you all talking about?
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You're bad!! I was talking about our cute little house pet, who turns into the devil when he has to be given a pill. Funny, but no one but me, gives him meds, so in the cats eye I am always the bad guy.. Even the vet has to tranquilize him too pill him....
Okay, enough talk about my precious kitty,, back to Reese's thread..
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02-25-2010, 08:56 PM
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#44
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Lifetime Premium Access
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: Degobah
Posts: 1,528
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I don't know who boobs are these but they are niceee!
this thread so much nicer than the others
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| 1 user liked this post
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02-25-2010, 09:12 PM
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#45
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Dec 24, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,143
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carkido45
You're like Boardman you try to hard to be funny and you're not.
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And your point is?
The ignore button is your friend, mijo.
Just go to your User Control Panel
Scroll down the "Edit Ignore List" link, it's on the left hand side under the "Settings & Options" menu.
Once you click on it, enter my member name at the prompt. That should do it. At that point you won't be bothered by anything I post, ever again.
It's that simple.
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