Welcome to ECCIE, become a part of the fastest growing adult community. Take a minute & sign up!

Welcome to ECCIE - Sign up today!

Become a part of one of the fastest growing adult communities online. We have something for you, whether you’re a male member seeking out new friends or a new lady on the scene looking to take advantage of our many opportunities to network, make new friends, or connect with people. Join today & take part in lively discussions, take advantage of all the great features that attract hundreds of new daily members!

Go Premium

Go Back   ECCIE Worldwide > General Interest > Diamonds and Tuxedos
test
Diamonds and Tuxedos Glamour, elegance, and sophistication. That's what it's all about here in ECCIE's newest forum which caters to those with expensive tastes, lavish lifestyles, and an appetite for upscale entertainment.

Most Favorited Images
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
Most Liked Images
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
  • Thumb
Top Reviewers
cockalatte 646
MoneyManMatt 490
Still Looking 399
samcruz 399
Jon Bon 396
Harley Diablo 377
honest_abe 362
DFW_Ladies_Man 313
Chung Tran 288
lupegarland 287
nicemusic 285
You&Me 281
Starscream66 279
George Spelvin 265
sharkman29 255
Top Posters
DallasRain70793
biomed163231
Yssup Rider60955
gman4453294
LexusLover51038
offshoredrilling48654
WTF48267
pyramider46370
bambino42590
CryptKicker37218
The_Waco_Kid37009
Mokoa36496
Chung Tran36100
Still Looking35944
Mojojo33117

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 06-30-2011, 03:32 PM   #1
!!Layla Angelique!!
Upgraded Female Account
 
User ID: 75510
Join Date: Mar 22, 2011
Location: Austin, TX - Available Worldwide
My Bio Page
Posts: 306
My ECCIE Reviews
Default Sugar Babies, Trophy Wives & the Men that Love them

Hi Forum! New girl here. I love writing so treat me nice, forgive my typos and I'll offer what I can.

Today a friend of mine asked me how I get men (in my real life) to financially support me, as if I had some secret method of gold digging (a practice I find distasteful). My traditional father raised me to believe it was part of a man's social, and even religious, duty to financially take care of his woman and family. Today in an time where going dutch is common and woman often makes more than their partners, this view may seem antiquated but I find it persists. The men I am attracted to are more characteristic of the old style of man (alpha-type, self-reliant, and masculine bordering on macho) and despite modern convention, they take pride in supporting their significant other.

For you men, do you get pleasure out of financially supporting your wife/girlfriend? Or do you subscribe to the modern way of thinking, that men and women should be equal partners in all aspects of life? Also, if you are financially supporting a woman, do you expect something more or different from her than if she was contributing as well?
!!Layla Angelique!! is offline   Quote
Old 06-30-2011, 03:59 PM   #2
Guest083011
Account Disabled
 
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Posts: 2,307
Encounters: 6
Default

Dear Layla,

Welcome to our little corner of eccie. We're glad you stopped by. I have always loved the name "Layla" for a variety of reasons, so you're already a step ahead with me.

As to SBs I've been seeing a couple recently. Fun times but not the electricity I have experienced last year with two specific SBs.

It is not a financial but intelligence, respect and attitude that I appreciate in those I spend time whether professionals or SBs.
Guest083011 is offline   Quote
Old 06-30-2011, 05:16 PM   #3
Whirlaway
Account Disabled
 
Join Date: Jan 3, 2010
Location: Here.
Posts: 13,781
Encounters: 28
Default

For you men, do you get pleasure out of financially supporting your wife/girlfriend? Not really.

Or do you subscribe to the modern way of thinking, that men and women should be equal partners in all aspects of life? Yes and NO.

Also, if you are financially supporting a woman, do you expect something more or different from her than if she was contributing as well? I expect more.
Whirlaway is offline   Quote
Old 06-30-2011, 11:17 PM   #4
Marcus Aurelius
Ambassador
 
Marcus Aurelius's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 25, 2009
Location: The Interhemispheric Fissure
Posts: 6,565
Encounters: 2
My ECCIE Reviews
Default

I've been burned by a lying X-wife.

You don't want me to answer about her.

As far as SB, or providers.......they have been AWESOME! I have fond fond memories of everyone of them.

Special women. I salute every one of them.
Marcus Aurelius is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 06:48 AM   #5
Marshall
BANNED
 
Join Date: Mar 14, 2011
Location: Wild Wild West!
Posts: 1,556
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SR Only View Post
It is not a financial but intelligence,
the more naked they get, the more intelligent you say they are....
Marshall is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 07:11 AM   #6
NinaBrooke
Account Disabled
 
User ID: 59709
Join Date: Dec 14, 2010
Location: stars
Posts: 3,680
Default

I think providers are at least honest, and it depends on the circumstances of the relationship if a financial consideration is accurate or not. If i have a 100% legitimate relationship it might be a bit off to ask for financial consideration, but if i have a relationship that somehow makes me a second class citizenship (mistress of a married man who has to shape relationship demands according to needs to other people) it would be hurting self esteem to not find any compensation but still not having better treatment than some escort (for example someone being there for you if you need it)
NinaBrooke is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 08:20 AM   #7
Marshall
BANNED
 
Join Date: Mar 14, 2011
Location: Wild Wild West!
Posts: 1,556
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ninasastri View Post
but if i have a relationship that somehow makes me a second class citizenship
feeling second class is a state of mind....nobody can make you feel that way except you....to say being a mistress is being second class is just you internalizing hetero-normative culture....you buy into it otherwise you wouldn't feel second class as a mistress.....
Marshall is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 09:44 AM   #8
Guest050715-1
Account Disabled
 
User ID: 2746
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 7,168
Default

I don’t view mistresses as second-class citizens, but they don’t have full signing rights of a wife do they? At least the first wife: the wife that predates all future / current wealth. There are differences. One’s wife will always take president on holidays and in a period of financial hardship. A mistress will never be invited to your children’s triumphs, share in your personal and career’s accolades. There are many differences. I think a mistress would be more expendable in the case of a catastrophic accident or illness than his wife. A man may love his mistress as much or even more than his wife. He probably desires her and her company more than his wife, but in the end, when push comes to shove he’ll choose his wife. We are just acculturated, and rightly so, to protect the family above all else.
Guest050715-1 is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 10:28 AM   #9
Marshall
BANNED
 
Join Date: Mar 14, 2011
Location: Wild Wild West!
Posts: 1,556
Default

I wonder what percentage of women who date married men think he will leave his wife for her.....the percentage should be 0%, but I'm sure it is higher.....if someone dates a married man and is unhappy about being 2nd, it's her own fault she is 2nd because nobody forced her into the relationship.....what part of MARRIED doesn't she get?....seems that you should know what you're getting when you date a married man and shouldn't enter the relationship if you can't be happy with what you get......and ladies, though men realize we often have to make ourselves financially useful to stick around, there actually are many women out there who are just happy to be with us without financial demands. We always find that a better situation for us......
Marshall is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 11:29 AM   #10
Guest050715-1
Account Disabled
 
User ID: 2746
Join Date: Dec 17, 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 7,168
Default

I think any woman dating or is in a relationship with a married man should understand that it is an arrangement. His marriage may be an arrangement too, but it's his marriage not a passing fancy. I know some marriages where men had mistresses that split up, but the marriage didn't split up because of the affair unless of course the wife initiated the divorce. For the most part, established men don't leave their wives even if he is fundamentally unhappy unless he has somewhere to go. In comes the mistress, and quite possibly the next future ex-wife. But she'll never have the full signing rights of his first wife.

Yes, men are wonderful creatures with our without money. I've never married for money, but I did reject a very wealthy man in favor of a man with a good job but no real wealth because he would be a better father to my daughter. The wealthy man felt I spoiled my child too much and that she and any future children should be sent to boarding school and in general raised by nannies. Absolutely not an option for me. So I chose the other guy, and we managed to make quite a bit of our own money - Took a while though. Both were men I could love, but family is more important to me than money.
Guest050715-1 is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 01:09 PM   #11
Guest083011
Account Disabled
 
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Posts: 2,307
Encounters: 6
Default

To anyone I date I specify that I love my wife (true), and I am not leaving her (also true). There is (or should not be) any abiguity to anyone I meet. Less pain for them and me. A few ladies have decided to pass on meeting me at some point. I do not wan't anyone thinking other wise. It keeps things honest and up front.
Guest083011 is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 01:18 PM   #12
Roshibear
Registered Member
 
Join Date: Feb 4, 2011
Location: Austin
Posts: 10
Default

Yes, I am a true alpha male--although a very sweet and gentle one, as opposed to arrogant and aggressive. On some level two million years of human evolution has wired us so that men compete for access to sex, while women compete for access to security. It is not as simple as this of course because as human beings we are one of the most plastic species on the planet allowing us to adapt to a wide range of social relationships and patterns. This plasticity is also hard wired into our brains. Having said that, it's been my experience that women who can surrender to this more primal aspect of their psychology also seem to have access to their more feminine aspects as well. I like this because I like being with a women who feels free to feel like a women, because I very much like being in touch with my own masculine qualities.

So I wouldn't say I expect more in this scenario only that I expect it to effect the character of the relationship-- presumably into something I am more comfortable with.
Roshibear is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 06:23 PM   #13
!!Layla Angelique!!
Upgraded Female Account
 
User ID: 75510
Join Date: Mar 22, 2011
Location: Austin, TX - Available Worldwide
My Bio Page
Posts: 306
My ECCIE Reviews
Default

THE GOOD
Don't you guys that have sugar babies feel good about helping them? With the help of a generous older boyfriend I was able to travel to almost ten different countries. And then the intellectual/mentor relationship was invaluable in my growth as a young woman. People on the outside see the "sugar daddy" as taking advantage of the young girl or the young girl as a leech but often the relationship is a beautiful example of giving, taking and sharing.

THE BAD
Conversely, another man who supported me financially, and insisted on it, often would bring up the fact that he owned my apartment during arguments. I think he felt because he paid my bills, he owned me. As you can imagine that relationship didn't last very long.

@Roshibear: I very much agree with you. The dynamic between men and women is very primitive and instinctual. Though I find the "Mystery Method" guy highly irritating, he has some interesting things to say on the subject.
!!Layla Angelique!! is offline   Quote
Old 07-01-2011, 07:37 PM   #14
Guest083011
Account Disabled
 
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Posts: 2,307
Encounters: 6
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by !!Layla Angelique!! View Post
THE GOOD
Don't you guys that have sugar babies feel good about helping them? With the help of a generous older boyfriend I was able to travel to almost ten different countries. And then the intellectual/mentor relationship was invaluable in my growth as a young woman. People on the outside see the "sugar daddy" as taking advantage of the young girl or the young girl as a leech but often the relationship is a beautiful example of giving, taking and sharing.

THE BAD
Conversely, another man who supported me financially, and insisted on it, often would bring up the fact that he owned my apartment during arguments. I think he felt because he paid my bills, he owned me. As you can imagine that relationship didn't last very long.
I agree with both your PoV. I really like helping out my friends. But others have noted about being beholden to the SD. It is either being available at a moments notice or where he holds his "ownership" over you. No fun.
Guest083011 is offline   Quote
Old 07-02-2011, 03:20 PM   #15
Tiffani Jameson
Pending Age Verification
 
User ID: 2590
Join Date: Dec 3, 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,096
My ECCIE Reviews
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roshibear View Post
Yes, I am a true alpha male--although a very sweet and gentle one, as opposed to arrogant and aggressive. On some level two million years of human evolution has wired us so that men compete for access to sex, while women compete for access to security. It is not as simple as this of course because as human beings we are one of the most plastic species on the planet allowing us to adapt to a wide range of social relationships and patterns. This plasticity is also hard wired into our brains. Having said that, it's been my experience that women who can surrender to this more primal aspect of their psychology also seem to have access to their more feminine aspects as well. I like this because I like being with a women who feels free to feel like a women, because I very much like being in touch with my own masculine qualities.

So I wouldn't say I expect more in this scenario only that I expect it to effect the character of the relationship-- presumably into something I am more comfortable with.
I completely agree with you, Mr. Roshibear.

The true Alpha male alone has the capability of bringing this primal/basic behavior out in a woman. Being a true Alpha female I understand that we are designed to compliment each other's natures. We have to understand that every man that has the wherewithal to call himself a SugarDaddy is not Alpha. Some are simply 'wannabe's' seeking control of a woman since he doesn't naturally have that skill. That's when you get situations like Ms. Layla described. Since his money didn't garner the respect he needed, he had to constantly remind her that he is the provider, and where she is she wouldn't be without him. I applaud her for getting rid of such a weak man.

@Layla: As far as a man's desire/motive to help a sugarbaby, this will differ with each man. Some are out to prove to themselves how far their money can get them. They seek out women that are weak-minded, and easily swayed. For others, it's a genuine exchange or reward of sorts, much like this arena, for availability. For women, having an open-minded view of relationships, fidelity, and love helps with making the endeavor less about what he gets out of the deal and more about how it works for you. When a woman's mind is not right, that's when she starts envying the wife, and crossing hard lines. When she figures out the secret, she cares less about being the wife, and accepts the love she gets within the limitations of the relationship.

But expectations should be clear for both parties. If the relationship doesn't work, don't force it. It's also very important to know who you are, and be realistic about what you need, and if it can be provided.
Tiffani Jameson is offline   Quote
Reply



AMPReviews.net
Find Ladies
Hot Women

Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright © 2009 - 2016, ECCIE Worldwide, All Rights Reserved