Custody question (lawyer advice needed)

[chefcurb]

I have a very dear friend of mine who has reached her limit with her husband's antics. She wants to leave. Problem is that while she earns income as a housekeeper and as such is all under the table, she can show no proof of income shy of bank statements proving that she has earned just as much as her husband the past 10 years. She is terrified that the vindictive nature of he and his mother may result in losing the most important thing in her life--her two year old son.

My question is can she lose her son to this guy because of her unreported income? Any help would be greatly appreciated from lawyer types or people who have been in this position. Thank you.

[turbo-dog]

Tax fraud does have some consequences... never heard of it impacting this situation though.

[tkdbf]

I could be wrong, I'm not a lawyer, but have gone through a nasty custody battle. To the best of my knowledge the tax fraud issues should be separate from the custody battle. Unless she would have to serve jail time for the tax issues, which would have to be brought about in a separate case, then it doesn't constitute proof that she is unable to care for her child. I don't know what state she lives in as it could differ from state to state.

Anyone that knows the laws dealing with this please correct me if I'm wrong. I wouldn't want to misled someone in a difficult situation like this one.

[chefcurb]

She is aware that there would be back taxes, penalties, etc. But would he not be implicated as well as he was a knowing party and they filed jointly? Does this give her a slight advantage in that his vindictiveness could put him in the same difficult spot? I forgot to mention that he didn't want the child to begin with, and the final straw last week where he said he didn't want to be the dad. He has anger and rage issues that she really doesn't want to expose her son to any longer. I suggested if she was going to end it, she should not wait for another rage, rather she should do it before it happens again when perhaps he is a calmer more rational mood.

[turbo-dog]

If they filed a joint return, they are equally liable under the IRS code. Having 1/2 of a couple filing fraudulent info is the best reason for doing a married-filing-separately return.
I don't see that being a major issue. She can always blame it on the guy, say he made her file her return that way. Hell, if she said it in court, he might fly off the handle in front of the judge (if he's that hot headed).

[dilbert firestorm]

she can always claim spousal abuse if her husband is such and ass to begin with.

turbo dogs comment might be a good way to bait him.

just sayin....

[docdavid49]

Don't know where she lives but... I went through a divorce in GA and several years later my ex "let" our daughter drop out of school. I'd have killed her first. Anyway, I asked my lawyer, here in Mississippi, if I could sue and get custody so I could get her back in school. He said that I could, but unless I could prove "unfit mother" and he claimed that it was all but impossible to do that, I would be wasting my money.

[BIG C]

Originally Posted by docdavid49

Don't know where she lives but... I went through a divorce in GA and several years later my ex "let" our daughter drop out of school. I'd have killed her first. Anyway, I asked my lawyer, here in Mississippi, if I could sue and get custody so I could get her back in school. He said that I could, but unless I could prove "unfit mother" and he claimed that it was all but impossible to do that, I would be wasting my money.

There's a whole lot of questions that need to be answered concerning the scenario posed by the OP here, but in responding to docdavid's scenario, I would suggest that the lawyer he spoke to was in error.....The universal criteria for a change in custody is (and I quote): "There is a material change in circumstances which has an adverse effect upon the child since entry of the last custody order.".....

Note the emphasis on the word material, meaning it has to be something more than just a minor, trivial change in things.....It has to be something major and the change has to have a major negative impact on the child.....Thus, I think a very good case can be made that allowing a minor to drop out of school {and therefore not obtain at least a high school diploma, or the GED equivalent) constitutes a material change in circumstances.....I know many judges here in MS and there used to be a few judges in SELA that have agreed with me on this and have ordered a change of custody when they believed it would help the kid get back in school to continue their education.....

Of course, these things are handled on a case by case individual basis which means the individual facts surrounding the case are what determines the outcome so your case (and the facts) are probably different and might yield different results, but I would have thought it would at least have been worth a try.....I can't really think of any reason good enough for just letting someone drop out of school before getting their high school diploma, but then again, I'm a bit biased on that and would love to live in a world where every kid at least finished high school.....

[chefcurb]

Thanks for the input guys. Big C, there are more details some of which I'm privy to and some probably not. Suffice it to say that there is a repetitive history with the husband throughout the past four years. She's from a very abusive childhood but wants things different for her son. At Christmas, there was a very calming effect that led her to believe that things could be different for her son with her husband. Rockwell-esque if you will. After all things had gone well for a couple of months without any rages or outbursts--the last being around Halloween when he got very angry with his son and got in his face and started going off. His son emulated what he saw a few weeks earlier when his dad threw a coke can at his wife (missed her thankfully) and threw a can at him.

These rages have come regularly almost every three months. Whether or not it's bipolar issues or anger is debatable, but the results are there nonetheless. Whereas before the child was born she was really co-dependent on the guy and while suggesting any of her friends leave the situation, she just couldn't. On the way an accident happened and the child she wished for so badly was born. Priorities have now changed and her son is number one. She realizes after the last outburst that he really doesn't want to be involved as a full time parent to his son. What upset her before has just angered her now and she wants to move on, but afraid of the consequences.

Probably more than I should know, but we are very good friends. Again thanks.