Update On Me

[Ms. Milani]

Sigh. As I mentioned before I already admitted to poor planning. This baby was not planned. I am highly allergic to birth control and used condoms and natural family planning with my ex. I had a program on my phone that told me my fertile days. Well to say the least it was wrong and I got pregnant. I personally refuse abortion and decided to work through out my pregnancy and save up. What I did NOT forsee was that I would start getting sick at 7 months pregnant. I have been constantly sick since then. I have ER discharge paperwork, doctor's prescriptions, ect to prove it. This being my 5th child I had NO idea that a pregnancy could suck so bad. Constantly in pain, can't even be on my feet without feeling like I'm going to pass out, fighting to keep my iron levels up, just rolling over in bed makes me want to cry from pain. BUT I do not regret my children. If it wasn't for my children I honestly have no idea where I'd be. They give me reason to breathe. I have NO intention of ever being in such a bad position again. I hate asking for help because I always feel like I don't deserve help. I know I'm a good person but I always feel worthless (guess it was the way I was raised). So I truly want to thank those that are helping now. This community cares more about me than my own family. The past few days I've been brought to tears by the caring and support everyone has shown me.

For some of the other things mentioned. My ex has tried day labor but he NEVER gets called. He will wait there for hours with nothing. He is looking into some temp agencies and delivery jobs now. I thank everyone that has sent me suggestions. They are great suggestions and I will definitely look into them.

I do have foodstamps and WIC since last month and those have been great. I cloth diaper so I don't have to worry about buying diapers.

For those that do help I'm willing to offer a session once I get back from maternity leave or even pay you back. I can do a notarized letter too.

Thank you again, everyone, for being so kind and helpful. Especially The White Queen. I met this beautiful woman for the first time a few days ago. She immediately jumped into action and has shown so much compassion and kindness. You are truly a blessing and I know you told me to pay it forward but one day I will find a way to repay your kindness.

Malaya

[ArisRose]

LOL! I have the same program that sends me text messages about my period/fertile days (mymonthcycles.com).

Does H&R block still give out loans in December if you agree to get your taxes done by them? With 5 kids y'all should clear 10K+ in tax refunds (if you got a good tax person).

I don't know how close you are to any major medical/research universities (there is normally 1 in any major city) but they have a lot of medical research studies you can sign up for. Me & my mom are always down for being test dummies.

Are there any plasma centers for you ex to hit up?

[Ms. Milani]

Originally Posted by ArisRose

LOL! I have the same program that sends me text messages about my period/fertile days (mymonthcycles.com).

Does H&R block still give out loans in December if you agree to get your taxes done by them? With 5 kids y'all should clear 10K+ in tax refunds (if you got a good tax person).

I don't know how close you are to any major medical/research universities (there is normally 1 in any major city) but they have a lot of medical research studies you can sign up for. Me & my mom are always down for being test dummies.

Are there any plasma centers for you ex to hit up?

I have no idea about H&R but that is definitely something to look into. I am a little iffy on the research studies since I'm pregnant and don't want to harm my baby. My ex doesn't qualify for research studies because he has a benign brain tumor and he tried to donate plasma but they said something about his veins being too small to donate and he didn't qualify. I will definitely look into the H&R Block though.

[Mokoa]

Let's stick to the topic and keep the animosity out of these forums.

Unless you have something relevant concerning assistance for Malaya, please move on to another thread. Your off topic post is not welcome here.

[italia]

Originally Posted by The White Queen

Somebody, give this guy a medal...afterall, a blind man reading that post couldn't fail to note it of the noblest caliber.

Too often such stupendous insight and charitable commentary go inadequately recognized, shame on...someone....tsssky-tssky (sad face ).

well put, well put

[italia]

oh and my brother goes to day labor every morning and he gets a check daily, i told you just pm me AND HE HAS THE TICKET to work THATS IF HE WANTS TO WORK all he has to do is show up at 5-6 a.m be at work 8 hours and bam check in hand for that day, if he lets them know he is going back the next day they will hold a spot for him and bam check that day and so forth by the time u know it "if u know how to MANAGE ur finances" u will be back on track, "like u were when u were workng" ;-) pm me so he CAN GO TO WORK ;-)

[Ms. Milani]

Italia, sent you a pm.

[CharlieKelly]

Originally Posted by vkmaster

Best wishes...but 4 kids under 6???

After this one...perhaps you should slow down on having more kids????

Originally Posted by The White Queen

Somebody, give this guy a medal...afterall, a blind man reading that post couldn't fail to note it of the noblest caliber.

Too often such stupendous insight and charitable commentary go inadequately recognized, shame on...someone....tsssky-tssky (sad face ).

Originally Posted by vkmaster

I mean no harm to the OP....but come on, the biggest responsibilty anyone of us have...is raising our kids. Sorry to be blunt, but part of the decision in becoming a solid parent is making sure when bringing a child into the world, that we can provide some type of financial security for that child.

Getting on a SHMB and reaching out for help, when you already have 4kids, under 6...smacks of very poor planning

And of yea...you also are entilted to your opinion...so NO I WILL not keep mine to myself...but thanks for your useless thought, lol

And one last thought to playVkeeps...how much are you donating to help out this lady's situation...or are you.....

Afraid I have to agree with Vkmaster, Sugartits.

[Ms. Milani]

Originally Posted by CharlieKelly

Afraid I have to agree with Vkmaster, Sugartits.

You should also read the other replies where Mokoa said to keep on topic and not to be commenting on whether you think I can handle my children. Regardless of how you feel. And also read MY reply on WHY it even happened.

[Ms. Milani]

So I want to know. If someone is doing GREAT financially. OFF WELFARE. And supporting her children JUST fine. Gets pregnant, gets really sick (completely unexpected) before she's able to save up, and cannot work it's automatically her fault? So for all those people that have gotten sick, gotten hurt, or laid off unexpectedly it's because THEY are stupid to have more kids when before it happened they were doing just fine financially?! Or do you think I was on welfare before I got pregnant and I'm just screwing over the system? I was NOT on welfare and I was FINE financially. I was going to save up money for my last few months. I did NOT expect to get sick and not be able to work. Who the hell expects that? Sure a small cold should only last a few days but being sick for TWO damn months? I mean..really?! You really think I should've expected that when ALL my other pregnancies were FINE?! So do me a favor and stay out of my uterus! Like I said..I admitted that I did NOT plan for my getting sick. But that does NOT make it your business that you can judge whether I'm allowed to have children or not! Do you honestly think I intend on living off welfare and other people?! You don't know me at ALL! I have so much pride and I wrote this post asking for advice. I NEVER asked for free money! The White Queen started the donation fund and while I'm grateful I've told everyone that has donated that I will happily pay them back or offer a session when I'm back on my feet. I WILL NOT BE STRUGGLING MY WHOLE LIFE. So for those trying to make it seem like I CHOOSE not to work..then think again. I have NEVER asked people for help like this before and now all I'm hearing is that I'm being bashed because I was SO stupid not to plan that I'd get sick for months and that I shouldn't be allowed any more children. So when someone gets laid off is that what you say to them too? In this sucky ass economy?! Here I am doing whatever the hell I have to do to support my kids and provide for them without any kind of help (yes I mean the hobby) and because I unexpectedly get sick now I don't deserve them?! I'm the mother that ALWAYS puts her children first. So yea..if my son is throwing up I'd rather stay home with him instead of sending him to daycare and seeing a stupid jackass that has no respect for women. Does that make me a bad mother? Fuck no. It makes me a damn good mother and I always will be. I always have done what I've needed to so I can provide for my children and I sure as hell won't have people trying to dictate MY fucking uterus.

So if you want to bash me then go right ahead. But Karma is a bitch and when something bad happens to you and you need help..nobody will be there. And you will know what it feels like to be bashed for something you had NO control over and something you NEVER expected.

For those that have given me advice thank you! I truly appreciate it. I'm due to give birth in a few days and will not be on very much. Please contact the White Queen in regards to anything. If you've donated to me PLEASE know (and I know I've told most of you this already) that I will HAPPILY pay you back as soon as I'm working again OR trade in session. I do NOT want free money.

Sorry for everyone else to have to hear my vent but I've been in early labor all damn day. In pain can barely fucking move because of my hip and I am getting tired of people judging me.

Good Karma to those that deserve it.

Malaya

[CharlieKelly]

Originally Posted by Malaya

So I want to know. If someone is doing GREAT financially. OFF WELFARE. And supporting her children JUST fine. Gets pregnant, gets really sick (completely unexpected) before she's able to save up, and cannot work it's automatically her fault? So for all those people that have gotten sick, gotten hurt, or laid off unexpectedly it's because THEY are stupid to have more kids when before it happened they were doing just fine financially?! Or do you think I was on welfare before I got pregnant and I'm just screwing over the system? I was NOT on welfare and I was FINE financially. I was going to save up money for my last few months. I did NOT expect to get sick and not be able to work. Who the hell expects that? Sure a small cold should only last a few days but being sick for TWO damn months? I mean..really?! You really think I should've expected that when ALL my other pregnancies were FINE?! So do me a favor and stay out of my uterus! Like I said..I admitted that I did NOT plan for my getting sick. But that does NOT make it your business that you can judge whether I'm allowed to have children or not! Do you honestly think I intend on living off welfare and other people?! You don't know me at ALL! I have so much pride and I wrote this post asking for advice. I NEVER asked for free money! The White Queen started the donation fund and while I'm grateful I've told everyone that has donated that I will happily pay them back or offer a session when I'm back on my feet. I WILL NOT BE STRUGGLING MY WHOLE LIFE. So for those trying to make it seem like I CHOOSE not to work..then think again. I have NEVER asked people for help like this before and now all I'm hearing is that I'm being bashed because I was SO stupid not to plan that I'd get sick for months and that I shouldn't be allowed any more children. So when someone gets laid off is that what you say to them too? In this sucky ass economy?! Here I am doing whatever the hell I have to do to support my kids and provide for them without any kind of help (yes I mean the hobby) and because I unexpectedly get sick now I don't deserve them?! I'm the mother that ALWAYS puts her children first. So yea..if my son is throwing up I'd rather stay home with him instead of sending him to daycare and seeing a stupid jackass that has no respect for women. Does that make me a bad mother? Fuck no. It makes me a damn good mother and I always will be. I always have done what I've needed to so I can provide for my children and I sure as hell won't have people trying to dictate MY fucking uterus.

So if you want to bash me then go right ahead. But Karma is a bitch and when something bad happens to you and you need help..nobody will be there. And you will know what it feels like to be bashed for something you had NO control over and something you NEVER expected.

For those that have given me advice thank you! I truly appreciate it. I'm due to give birth in a few days and will not be on very much. Please contact the White Queen in regards to anything. If you've donated to me PLEASE know (and I know I've told most of you this already) that I will HAPPILY pay you back as soon as I'm working again OR trade in session. I do NOT want free money.

Sorry for everyone else to have to hear my vent but I've been in early labor all damn day. In pain can barely fucking move because of my hip and I am getting tired of people judging me.

Good Karma to those that deserve it.

Malaya

false_equivalency.txt

[Guest083013]

.....simply wishing you well Malaya

[Ms. Milani]

Originally Posted by CharlieKelly

false_equivalency.txt

How so? So please do explain how someone unexpectedly getting sick near the end of their pregnancy when working doesn't compare to someone else getting sick or hurt when also pregnant in any other job field? Or would you rather believe that I have been constantly struggling my whole life, not able to pay my bills, and then just decided to pop another kid out? Because that's what it sounds like.

[Ms. Milani]

Mods please close the thread before I really lose my temper. I did not put this up to get bashed or to have people try and control my uterus. I asked for ADVICE, barters, and JOBS! But apparently this is turning into "oh she should've known she'd get sick so she's stupid for having another child". They don't seem to understand that I was NOT under ANY financial strain when I got pregnant and until I got sick. And that I had all my bills paid BY myself.

[Ms. Milani]

And don't even bother responded Charlie. I'm going to block you anyways. Why? Not because I'm booty hurt or any of that crap but because you beyond frustrate me that you seem to think everyone's life is perfect and no one will ever experience any kind of pain or suffering. You have NO idea what pain and suffering is. You have NO idea all the crap I've gone through in my life and I STILL have picked myself back up and kept moving. You are nothing but negative energy which I don't need in my life.