Men: I am seeking understanding

[phildo]

A reputable provider who isn't known for cash and dash has every right to set an expectation of "gift" on the front end, and get it out of courtesy or respect. A regular anywhere else can't walk the tab. Call him out.

[Cheburashka]

Originally Posted by sexy.heather39

I feel like TRASH......disposable garbage he felt like he didn't need to call again.

Don't believe the lie. You are NOT trash. This is about him and not about you. Just keep on being great and giving good service. Guys like that always seem to fade into the sunset.

[Bestman200600]

Always pay the girls. They have bills to pay.

[exoticdanceweardealer]

Originally Posted by Bestman200600

Always pay the girls. They have bills to pay.

Absolutely. We have to keep the ladies happy guys!

[pyramider]

Originally Posted by JDNorthface

Obviously none of us knows why this happened, only that it did and you feel terrible. And you have a right to feel that way. I'm sorry. But let me throw this out there and see if perhaps this might explain his (wrongful) thinking.

Many men feel guilty about participating in the hobby, whether they admit it or not. Every visit brings another internal struggle and another promise that "this is going to be the last time. I'm going to quit." But they can't quit (and looking at your gallery, we can understand this). They keep coming back and keep feeling guilty. Desperate to finally stop and make an honest person of themselves, they'll short--or completely stiff--an ATF to throw a roadblock into the relationship so he CAN'T return.

In the end, my guess is he'll call to apologize, claim that it was a complete oversight and promise to make it up to you. Then, because he's addicted to you, he will show back up with back pay in hand for another wonderful session.

Then he'll feel guilty all over again...

Oh for fucks sake ... the fucktard stole the pooty. You drop the envelope once in the door. Not when you are leaving. The fucktard has been around long enough to have five sessions, he knows the rules.

Feeling guilty my lily white ass ... he is getting atta boys from his hobby buds.

[Guest071613-2]

Originally Posted by pyramider

Oh for fucks sake ... the fucktard stole the pooty. You drop the envelope once in the door. Not when you are leaving. The fucktard has been around long enough to have five sessions, he knows the rules.

Feeling guilty my lily white ass ... he is getting atta boys from his hobby buds.

'Atta boy! I couldn't agree more! Except, your ass is NOT lily white. I think you have been getting some sun on those buns, mister!

Can I have my cookie privileges back now??

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by sexy.heather39

THANK YOU ALL!!! wow, you don't know how much better i feel!!!

Ya'll are the best!!

heather, sorry this happened to you.
others have given you great advice and suggestions [esp. letting others know who he is IF he doesnt correct his mistake].

mine is - DONT let this make you feel bad about yourself!!!
from what you wrote, i dont read where you did anything wrong or bad or terrible.
i'm glad that you feel better!!!

kisses and more where you need them!!!!!

[KittyLamour]

Heather I am so sorry that this happened to you. It seems so hard to believe that he did it on purpose after having seen you 5 times...don't give up on him quite yet. I hope he does the right thing and makes it right. It is literally hobby suicide if he did do it on purpose.
I know how it feels... when I was a brand new & inexperienced provider... I had a client who stole the donation back after putting it on the dresser. I called him and he cussed me out, I posted an alert ... his next step was to write a review without 2 cents of truth to it...and that was just the part I could see!
Who knows what he was thinking, if he did it on purpose...karma will be a bigger bitch than you will ever need to be and if it was an accident, I'm sure he will make it right for you. Keep your head up! You are a beautiful person inside and out and you know I care about you very much.
Your friend & neighbor

-Cha Cha-

[Jewish Lawyer]

Some people are just assholes - hopefully he will get his ass kicked someday.

[Copierguy0]

Sexy Heather, I ALWAYS get the Business part of it, out of the way FIRST
That way there is NO room for Error. Ask anyone that I have seen. I wish all hobbyists would do this. (Friendly Advice for all providers: Once the gentleman pays, DON'T leave it in plain sight, put it away.) Heather, if your gentleman friend don't make good on the session, chalk it up to: We all know why we are here and some of us conduct business differently than others. I hope this person is not one of my Friends.

CG

[clawsonmills]

I echo that sentiment of others here that I am sorry you got burned like that. In this hobby world and even in the real world, You can trust but verify.

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by sexy.heather39

I NEVER ask for the donation up front, I wouldn't want that to set the tone for our time together. In fact I would rather $ never be discussed.

I had a a regular (I have seen him 5 times) ECCIE client leave without a donation left, no response to my text.

...

WHY? WHAT WAS HE THINKING?

what's the update on this?
how long was it from time he did this until you posted? until now??
if just a few hrs or even a day, i'd say wait 48 hrs or so.
has he responded to ANY communication from you??
have you asked other women if he ever did something like that to them?

hope it all works out for you.
just another one of life's courses in how some people act.
something we can all learn from. or not.

[B.Wayne]

Sorry this happend. Your attitude of waiting the get the donation and way you approach it is very refreshing. There is only one girl I have seen to date that does similar. I can't tell you why other than some guys are simply assholes. They like getting away with things if they can. Some may look down on you and think that it's no big deal why should they care. I see this even off of this site on about evey other day. It makes me sick. It's a weird thing looking at it from both sides. I could go on but there is not point. I hope he at least does the right thing.

[TexTushHog]

Certainly sounds suspicious since he didn't respond to the texts. But I have left an incall without paying inadvertently once. About ten or fifteen minutes later, the girl called -- sort of embarrassed -- saying she forgot, too. No incredible performance on my part, we just got to talking about a book we had both read on the way out the door. I hustled back and pai, quite embarrassed I didn't notice. Rare, no doubt, but it happens.

Also, did you yet him before? Some folks still don't text. I hate it, but finally had to get a phone with text capacity. That being said, I'll bet I don't use 10 a month (except when I'm in Europe and get 200 texts a month and calls are tres expensive).

[TinMan]

You say you "worshiped on a whole other level". Is it possible he's confusing hobby and love? It's no excuse for leaving you in a lurch, but it is a lesson to others to make sure we don't confuse the business with the personal.

Btw, I appreciate your approach to the business. I prefer no discussion of finances, either. On the few occasions I mistakenly left without paying, I immediately returned to the "scene of the crime" to correct the error.