There is no sex that is completely safe sex as others have stated (with regard to STI's).
Most of the acids in your mouth and stomach will kill things like HIV and other virii. Having cuts or sores makes it more risky. Women are always more at risk than men due to more/larger entry points. This is why BBFS is definitely more risky for a woman (though it can still affect both partners).
The only risky activity of any significance (if you're going to have sex at all - with "anyone") is BBFS. And I would even go so far as to say that it's not even
*that* much more risky than many other activities unless you are doing it quite a lot, in a hobby like this for example, or with a woman that is seeing "lots" of men. Cumming inside while doing BBFS obviously makes it far more risky (both for pregnancy and viral transmission).
The fact is swapping bodily fluids is risky. But we can't avoid that. We do it all the time. It's all around us every time we go to the bathroom in a public place, use a water fountain, touch a doorknob, and so on. Getting sweaty and nasty with someone of course increases those chances.
Now, it's a given that you are putting yourself at a higher risk in this hobby b/c there are many, many partners sharing bodily fluids at a high frequency. However, I'm not at all convinced that a playboy or playgirl just picking people up every other night at the clubs and at parties is really any more protected.
I'll be super honest and admit that I've had BBFS with various people: brand new girlfriends on the first night I met them (1 of which became my wife but now my ex-wife) as well as hobby providers. When I have done it in the hobby it has mainly been just a few girls I knew really well, one of whom I was basically seeing on the side, not paying for anymore. Though we did start doing it when I was paying (just being honest). The other one or two providers I've done that with (bbfs) asked me if they could do it. It was while they were on top. I've never asked...not once. They have been the ones to ask, like, "can I put it in...please...I hate condoms, I have birth control patch, etc". As if that was my primary worry right? Hahaha. Obviously in the heat of the moment my little head won over my big head. And with one girl in particular we continued to do that as we saw each other frequently we never used condoms. Though she did ask me that first time on only our second meeting! I was in shock. It was just so hot though. It was already going in from the stripper slide, like the head was going in and out pretty deeply, and then she just asked (she was the one forcing the head in while she was on top rocking back and forth with the SS). I couldn't resist. I couldn't. OMG. That one is seared into my brain for eternity
. Same deal with the girl I mentioned that I started seeing on the side. Exactly the same. Wow. That was some hot fucking. Mmmm. Goddamn. I'll be like 90yrs old one day and still remember every sensation, every detail, every feeling, of those particular girls, on those nights.
Anyway, I've never had an STI. I have, however, gotten a damn throat infection from kissing a nasty girl that was obviously a crack whore and had a cold. I should have walked out immediately. I basically did but those 5min of mouth action were enough to give me her damn sore throat and cough for 2 days afterward. That's the worst I've experienced.
I wouldn't advise anyone to roll the dice or do something they feel is unsafe. But sex itself involves the swapping of bodily fluids, various bodily fluids. If you're doing it right. If it doesn't involve any of that then you are wasting your time or money and/or doing it wrong anyway. So take that for what it's worth. The point is it's not
*as* risky as many would have you believe, but certainly in the hobby it's
riskier than in everyday regular life.
No you can't tell by looking at someone, certainly not, but I also wouldn't go near a walking needle zombie or crack whore (condom or no condom). Not only b/c it's gross as fuck but b/c I don't want any of her shit getting on me.
You need to do what you feel is safe and what you and your partner at the time are comfortable with between two consenting adults (provider or no provider).
-mathguy
