50th Review Crazy Ideas - What fictional review would you enjoy reading?

[Annika]

Originally Posted by Still Looking

Couldn't compete with TS SL

Nope because he is Austin's finest TS! That SL HE IS!

[Zhivago52]

Valentina riding a Sybian as she reads erotic literature.

[Guest070818-1]

Originally Posted by fun2come

I am coming up on my 50th review, and while I have already something special planned, I also, after a few TEQUILA SHOTS, came up with a few ideas that would be FUN reading about.

So cast your vote or add other ideas for some fictional FUN reviews ....

I'll like to vote for Tequila Shots.

[Miss Valentina]

Originally Posted by Toyz

Sounds like a Bonn challenge to me Ms V.

I could pick up the entirety of that which is Bonn11 at the nape of the neck 'twix my Cherry Red painted thumb and forefinger like one would any other scurrilous vermin, and with a swift kick to the derriere, deliver the entirety of his person to the far opposite side of the block.

Once I made an off-color remark and gave him a withering look and it buckled his knees and had him gripping his walking apparatus and gasping for water. He had to be borne from the venue in a gurney.

For all his braggadocio and crudeness he wouldn't last five seconds in the glow of my femininity. He and his ilk would never have the deftness of mind, the creativity, the acumen and certainly not the stamina of a successful and cunning lover for me to lovingly cast my sooten lashes downward, kiss his hand, and with a low and demurring tone give him the title of "My Maestro"

[Miss Valentina]

Originally Posted by readysetgo12

I've tried my best ... work in progress.

My lover, I will readily admit to a certain weakness of leg and the sensation of impending vapors when I am in your presence. No one has yet to divest me of so much of my sumptuous coif as you. But we have only begun our tour of carnal depravity.

Can you be the man that brings me to heel?

[Toyz]

Originally Posted by Miss Valentina

I could pick up the entirety of that which is Bonn11 at the nape of the neck 'twix my Cherry Red painted thumb and forefinger like one would any other scurrilous vermin, and with a swift kick to the derriere, deliver the entirety of his person to the far opposite side of the block.

Once I made an off-color remark and gave him a withering look and it buckled his knees and had him gripping his walking apparatus and gasping for water. He had to be borne from the venue in a gurney.

For all his braggadocio and crudeness he wouldn't last five seconds in the glow of my femininity. He and his ilk would never have the deftness of mind, the creativity, the acumen and certainly not the stamina of a successful and cunning lover for me to lovingly cast my sooten lashes downward, kiss his hand, and with a low and demurring tone give him the title of "My Maestro"

Au contraire my ginger topped vixen. Bonn (the legend and the man) has penned many self anointing essays detailing not only his acumen of the feminine physique, but mastery of same.

He has (by his own admission) laid more asspipe than is present in the entirely of Alaska. Bonn is not lacking for Money-& its not all in Penneys-(bonus points for any of you mother fuckers can get that one)...he has bedded & can afford to bed...Hoogarists from all sides of the financial scale.

His ego is paramount. His manhood omnipotent. His gaze melts the hearts & minds of both Hoogar & starlet.

Passing on a lifetime opportunity my love...I beseech you at least consider the joy you are forsaking.

[playingnthedark]

Originally Posted by Miss Valentina

Oh wow gentlemen, I must say I'm terribly flattered. As much as I would love to see a facetious review of someone scrogging me silly, allow me to throw down the gauntlet. Why write a fictitious account when perhaps there is someone out there who can make the fantasy come true?!

I would love to meet the Wayne Wonderloin who could whipsaw me into a stupefied silence. To make my fingertips wibble at the cusp of my keyboard. A creamed out, stammering, knock-knee'd version of myself. If this were accomplished, I would provide the hour completely gratis (that means free you fools )

Is there one amongst the phalanx of Austin's most committed debauchees who can top the hell out of this little red headed strumpet? Is there One Cock to Rule Them All out there? Inquiring slopabottomi want to know!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cp8dt2lRwi8

Hmmmm

[fun2come]

Clearly I voted for Miss Valentina cause I am sick and tired of looking up every third word...

Hey Ms. V, let's give it a shot, I settle for 3 short paragraphs (3-4 liners) with easy words after our session .... OK, OK, my Polka Fuck may not be strong enough for that... 2 paragraphs ....

Originally Posted by JennsLolli

I'm for the Miss V option, so long as it's big and legit hard. Bitch needs a pounding.

Let see: , ,

[fun2come]

Originally Posted by BrownSugarBaby

I'll like to vote for Tequila Shots.

You provide the Tequila, I provide the Shots ????

I think I may get some ideas here for reviews 48,49, 51, 52 ....

Heck, If somebody intrigues me, I may even put it down for consideration on #50.

[NikkiWhite]

i thought u were putting ur bratwurst in my pretzel but i guess fucking not....

hey tequila i have some of that right here

( ssshhh dont tell im drinking and eccie-ing)

[fun2come]

Nikki, throw in some Ping Pong ball target shooting (at me, you know I deserve it) and you're on !!!

[Miss Valentina]

Originally Posted by Toyz

Au contraire my ginger topped vixen. Bonn (the legend and the man) has penned many self anointing essays detailing not only his acumen of the feminine physique, but mastery of same.

He has (by his own admission) laid more asspipe than is present in the entirely of Alaska. Bonn is not lacking for Money-& its not all in Penneys-(bonus points for any of you mother fuckers can get that one)...he has bedded & can afford to bed...Hoogarists from all sides of the financial scale.

His ego is paramount. His manhood omnipotent. His gaze melts the hearts & minds of both Hoogar & starlet.

Passing on a lifetime opportunity my love...I beseech you at least consider the joy you are forsaking.

Toyz, when I read this late last night, I nearly forcefully expelled my divine dram of Pappy Van Winkle. (that's a whiskey. Get your mind out of the gutter)

If a withered antediluvian lumpen sadistic golem is somebody's William Wallace then who am I to judge? Just because I wouldn't receive him in a Fleshlight duct taped to a 20' pole doesn't mean that someone who appears, for all intents and purposes, to have been assembled from the detritus that accumulates in the the bends of hooker's shower pipes doesn't mean he's not deserving of laying 8 and 3/4 yards of pipe into the backsides of more adventurous maidens.

Thank you for setting me straight. I was getting high-falutin' there for a minute.

[Usual suspects]

Bonn11 is the product of intelligent design. Legend says that in the spring of 2011 at Deutsche Forschungsgemeinschaft (DFG) in Germany. A trio of post Doc research assistants were on the verge of a major scientific breakthrough that would fundamentally alter our perception of life, the universe, and everything. The final step prior to going public with the breakthrough was the dreaded internal peer review by Doktor Mary Jane Faulschritt (Rottencrotch).

One day Dr. Faulschritt entered the laboratory and approached Dr. Elizabeth Flüstern, the Chief research scientist, and informed her in no uncertain terms that she would not sign off on the review. Instead she had prepared a report for the Board of Governors detailing her suspicions that grant funds for the project had been squandered on bier, women, and an absurd amount of research into un-natural male enhancement.

The three were devastated, how could Dr. Faulschritt see thru the ruse and come to the heart of the matter and know the truth? Alas, there was nothing left to do they must deliver a product. The three had to come up with the answer to life, the universe, and everything and the clock was ticking.

Soon, Dr. Frank-N-Furter (a sweet transvestite) approached the others and said "I could show you my favorite obsession....I've been making a man....With blonde hair and a tan. And he's good for relieving my......(say it).....tension!" And, "In just seven days....I can make you a Man!"

It was decided there were only two choices, go to EU jail for misuse of scientific research funds or, make a man that could slay Dr. Faulschritt. After reviewing the research and inventorying the equipment the conclusion was obvious. They had the know how and they had the equipment, they were only missing one thing. The genetic base. When faced with the inevitable truth it was Dr. Nochauf der Suchenach who stepped forward to donate his body to science.

Dr. Suchenach was lowered into a solution of male enhancement chemicals, and Dr. Elizabeth Flüstern donated a Tantus Curve dildo (in Purple Haze) from her personal collection. The final electrodes were connected and it was time. Frank stood back and threw the switch. The lights went out, an odd smell filled the lab, and a cloud of smoke rose from the chemical bath. Thus Bonn11 was born into the world.

[fun2come]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[Usual suspects]

Danke Schoen