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Security Matters Personal security is of the utmost priority. Discussions regarding every aspect of personal security within the hobby can be found here.

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Old 12-03-2012, 04:01 PM   #16
40F Cougar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mikkifine View Post
bobo444-- Well hopefully you won't be in those spas when they get raided. Take care and good luck!

Have you heard of Black Tuesday? Over 10 American spas were shut down at the same day and time.
You do have to be careful at the mp, and spas. They closed down a lot where I use to live because of trafficking, so you do run a risk of being there when that happens.
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Old 12-04-2012, 02:29 PM   #17
Candence
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I am by no means easy to see, but definitely it is possible for a newbie. I thought if I provided a process that I use for screening newbies, it may help gentlemen trying to get through the newbie phase, and certainly with less frustration.

The first step is for the newbie to recognize that you have very little or no history so you have to provide something that will reassure the lady that you are hoping to see, will have some comfort that you are not LE or crazy. I have found that gentlemen have a greater sense of comfort if the lady first provides her history.. ie. reviews, and links to profiles on boards that she has actively participated on for a quantifiable amount of time. Truly, you should not be concerned with providing the basic information required to a verified provider with history, as we would not have enjoyed the years of safe and fun hobbying if we used the information inappropriately. So, I send newbies my links first and hopefully will be comfortable enough to provide the required personal information. If you are still uncomfortable either request that you have a chance to visit on the phone, or keep looking.

One way I verify employment is that if the gentleman can send me an email from his work email. This will suffice if it is a large verifiable company that I research if necessary, before clearing that phase of the process. I reassure the prospect, that I will not respond to that email, and will delete immediately upon receipt. If that is not an option, I will ask for a professional license that could be verified online or a website that they can be found on, or sometimes use the employer issued health insurance card along with a dl provided the employer is on the insurance card. I always ask them to cover their address and dl#. I use the dl for a picture id that matches the person on the ins. card. If none of these options are acceptable for the newbie, than I will always pass.
As far as verifying the "crazy" portion of the process, I require that anyone I meet for the first time call for a chat, as this will not only re-assure me that I am making a good decision, but it also assures the client that he has made a good choice in me.

I hope that helps everyone... as I've had a lot of providers asking for my methods for screening newbies as well as helping the newbies get through the verification process without too much frustration! If necessary, you could perhaps ask a lady if this method would be acceptable to her if it works for you!

Good luck in your quest!
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Old 12-05-2012, 12:30 PM   #18
JackFromPhoenix
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Question Just curious ...

Candence ... Just curious, how do you verify Newbies who are not employed in a traditional job situation? For example, independent consultants, retired, wealthy, bums, etc. ... Thanks for sharing - Jack

Quote:
Originally Posted by Candence View Post
I am by no means easy to see, but definitely it is possible for a newbie. I thought if I provided a process that I use for screening newbies, it may help gentlemen trying to get through the newbie phase, and certainly with less frustration.

The first step is for the newbie to recognize that you have very little or no history so you have to provide something that will reassure the lady that you are hoping to see, will have some comfort that you are not LE or crazy. I have found that gentlemen have a greater sense of comfort if the lady first provides her history.. ie. reviews, and links to profiles on boards that she has actively participated on for a quantifiable amount of time. Truly, you should not be concerned with providing the basic information required to a verified provider with history, as we would not have enjoyed the years of safe and fun hobbying if we used the information inappropriately. So, I send newbies my links first and hopefully will be comfortable enough to provide the required personal information. If you are still uncomfortable either request that you have a chance to visit on the phone, or keep looking.

One way I verify employment is that if the gentleman can send me an email from his work email. This will suffice if it is a large verifiable company that I research if necessary, before clearing that phase of the process. I reassure the prospect, that I will not respond to that email, and will delete immediately upon receipt. If that is not an option, I will ask for a professional license that could be verified online or a website that they can be found on, or sometimes use the employer issued health insurance card along with a dl provided the employer is on the insurance card. I always ask them to cover their address and dl#. I use the dl for a picture id that matches the person on the ins. card. If none of these options are acceptable for the newbie, than I will always pass.
As far as verifying the "crazy" portion of the process, I require that anyone I meet for the first time call for a chat, as this will not only re-assure me that I am making a good decision, but it also assures the client that he has made a good choice in me.

I hope that helps everyone... as I've had a lot of providers asking for my methods for screening newbies as well as helping the newbies get through the verification process without too much frustration! If necessary, you could perhaps ask a lady if this method would be acceptable to her if it works for you!

Good luck in your quest!
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:30 AM   #19
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Thumbs up

That gets a bit trickier.... but I do have some retired gents that make up my regular clients... The first step is to talk on the phone. After a conversation to get to know the newbie a bit, I would make a judgement call.... if in doubt but still interested, I have even met at a local spot for coffee, lunch or a beer and go from there.








Quote:
Originally Posted by JackFromPhoenix View Post
Candence ... Just curious, how do you verify Newbies who are not employed in a traditional job situation? For example, independent consultants, retired, wealthy, bums, etc. ... Thanks for sharing - Jack
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:23 AM   #20
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Often not ALL information asked for is REQUIRED. My contact form asks for this information, but if some of the fields are left blank (i.e. last name, place of business, etc.) and references are provided, along with p411 or date check, this is quite acceptable. I just need enough information to be able to assure myself that you are safe. The other fields are there to provide alternative screening methods, for those without references.
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Old 12-08-2012, 03:54 PM   #21
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Just wondering...what are alternative screening methods if you're not a verified member of sites like p411, yet you do not want to give your work info? Are there many providers who would do like Candence?
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:45 PM   #22
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Lightbulb Maybe you could suggest method to a provider you have interest in seeing....

Just a suggestion... You could suggest one of the methods you found acceptable to a provider you were hoping to see.... or save my post to this thread and forward to her.

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Just wondering...what are alternative screening methods if you're not a verified member of sites like p411, yet you do not want to give your work info? Are there many providers who would do like Candence?
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Old 01-18-2013, 09:55 AM   #23
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Cadence, thank you for your input on this. As a newbie, I have similar questions/concerns as the OP where I understand the need for screening, but am petrified about what could happen if the provider decided to mess with me by contacting my employer, or if LE got involved.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Candence View Post
One way I verify employment is that if the gentleman can send me an email from his work email. This will suffice if it is a large verifiable company that I research if necessary, before clearing that phase of the process. I reassure the prospect, that I will not respond to that email, and will delete immediately upon receipt.
Just one quick comment - please don't rely on an Email address to verify the sender's employment. Unless you know how to interpret the Email headers, please be aware that the "From" Email address field can be easily spoofed by a person familiar with relatively simple Email protocols.
(If you know how to read the header information, then you can filter out a majority of spoofs - not 100% of course, but it is almost impossible to identify someone who can mess with the Email header information because it has to be done from within that organization's Email servers)

Just thought I'd share
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Old 01-18-2013, 08:15 PM   #24
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Hey Folks

Thanks for all the valuable feed back and the quick How to from Jannisary. I am finding that is pretty standard info to give up. I am little paranoid just starting out. One can never be to safe on either side of the table.

The hard part was being seperated for employment temporarily.
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Old 01-19-2013, 08:28 PM   #25
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Why not avoid all this hassle and just sign up for P411!!! You will recoup your $90 bucks if you plan on playing for a bit.
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Old 01-21-2013, 01:10 AM   #26
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hey man i have 13 okays on 411, i had probably 19 at one time but deleted some and you would not believe the screening this girl did on me in KC last night....absurd! won't go into detail but will say i have always lived by the code you can never be tooo safe....this makes me retract that belief
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Old 01-21-2013, 03:51 PM   #27
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In my experience, to protect themselves from the crappiest, creepiest, most undesireable, vile hobbyists, knowledgeable Providers usually ask:

"Are you dearhunter?"
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Old 01-21-2013, 06:03 PM   #28
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i like to always do a white page reversal # if it says un known i get paranoid.or if i google # and nothing comes up. then im likely to not reply.lol. unless he member here a good while or p411 .sometimes its good be paranoid,,almost saw a convited child molester! never called him back! eeppss
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Old 01-23-2013, 02:33 PM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Old Dingus View Post
In my experience, to protect themselves from the crappiest, creepiest, most undesireable, vile hobbyists, knowledgeable Providers usually ask:

"Are you dearhunter?"
I suddenly feel the call to head to the nearest Sonic.........heh
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Old 01-24-2013, 09:05 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kiki2012 View Post
i like to always do a white page reversal # if it says un known i get paranoid.or if i google # and nothing comes up. then im likely to not reply.lol. unless he member here a good while or p411 .sometimes its good be paranoid,,almost saw a convited child molester! never called him back! eeppss

Kiki start using that with PhoneRegistry,Spokeo, and xdd.org. They really work because I dont do provider refs.
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