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Old 04-24-2013, 07:07 PM   #1
Zabrina Sarafina
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Default History and Biography of the Highly Successful Provider

What makes a provider become highly successful?

Instead of asking what would be the traits of a highly successful provider, you should ask where are they from, - that is where you will discover the logic of success

Successful providers don't get to that level by just their individual traits (ex. physical attractiveness, personality, intelligence, ambition etc.) and neither do they make it alone

We {society} play a large role in deciding who makes it and who doesn't.

Opportunity - the best rise to the top not only because of their "talent" but because they had a big head start from an early age which played a critical role in their success

Innate talent (see above traits) does matter but not nearly as much as the environment the provider was raised in (preparation). There is a set of social savvy skills/knowledge that need to be learned. And the place where a provider seems to get this type of attitude and skills is from her family

Here's one type of example: Social Class

There was an extended study done by a sociologist where she and her team spent most of each day observing the daily lives of young children and their interaction within their family - black and white, poor working class to middle upper class

Results: In middle - upper class families the parents were heavily involved in their kid's lives, keeping them busy with activities and questioning them if their teachers, classmates, coaches etc were getting along fine. They encouraged their kids to stand up for themselves in social institutions, to take care of themselves, to question adults in positions of authority. If their kids were doing poorly in school the parents challenged their teachers and made sure their kids succeeded.

This style of parenting is an attempt to nurture and motivate a child's opinions, talents, skills

Poor parents on the other hand simply weren't as interested in their kid's lives and saw a kid's life as separate from an adults. They were also intimidated by authority, reacted passively and stayed in the background. They saw it as their responsibility to raise the kid but wanted to let them grow up and develop on their own. Kids from this environment grew up feeling more quiet, submissive, distant, separated, distrusting, restricted. They didn't know how to get their way or adapt - whatever environment they were in - to work for their best interest

While neither parenting style is morally superior to another, the kids from wealthier families learn a sense of "entitlement" by constantly being exposed to a changing set of experiences, learning teamwork,how to act in highly structured social institutions, interacting with adults and speaking up for herself if she needs to. This cultivating style of parenting obviously comes with enormous advantages that continue and locks the child into patterns of achievement and encouragement

Back to Opportunity - So if you separate the highly innately talented (ex. born very physically attractive, good personality, intelligence, etc.) from the untalented (and if you provide the talented with a superior advantage (ex being raised in a more cultivating environment) you are going to end up giving a huge advantage to that 'special' group of people

Success then be defined as the result of "accumulative advantage"

So you can then say whether a provider can become highly successful or not largely depends not on her own individuality as a lone factor, but on other people, the culture that helped her become who she is

Now how all of this connects and translates into the various facets of the hobby world is up to you with your own unique perspective to see. I mean look around it's everywhere, look closer, notice the details and amuse yourself by being able to see the bigger picture

Some of you while reading this will be uh huh yea that's my story that's how I was raised and as a provider it has made me become who and how I am how I choose to treat myself and others - you view yourself as very differently than from another who did not had the upbringing as you and sees herself as less worthy, respected, 'special', some of you will disagree and argue all of this is overly cookie cutter simplistic simply isn't how it always works out in the real world for which I will agree with you. And a few of you will be like ok so what does all this has anything to do with anything! For real I wasted 5 mins reading this crap LOLLLL
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Old 04-24-2013, 08:45 PM   #2
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The comparative influences of nature vs nurture, and environment vs instinct is a subject with much interest and ramification. Thanks for sharing an interesting perspective on how it affects your profession. I'm not sure of your conclusions, nor do I think you are.

It made me think of a recent favorite of mine, who, if what she told me is true, and I have no reason to believe anything she says is true, came from somewhat of a broken home and has been around the hobby a long time, and adds a lot of free love to her behavior pattern as well. She has intelligence and many good instincts that could make her a top notch provider, but then she also lapses into self-destructive bouts of behavior as well which certainly seem to indicate daddy and/or abandonment issues.

I conclude your analysis is not limited nor unique to your profession.
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Old 04-24-2013, 09:22 PM   #3
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I have to point out, most of the traits you mentioned as examples of the traits instilled by the more successful parenting method are not likely to result in a more successful provider.

A sense of entitlement, how to act in highly structured situations, etcetera... These are rather resoundingly NOT the traits that are likely to make one successful as a provider.

The traits that are likely to make a successful provider are caring about the client, a "service" mentality, the desire to do a good job at what she's doing, enough paranoia to stay safe, a reasonable appetite for risk (after all, there's no getting around the existence of some risk), enough organization to keep appointments and supplies, etcetera, and a fairly high sex drive.

None of those traits are particularly socio-economically class driven. If anything, most of them lean toward the *lower* socioeconomic orders.

Additionally, many successful escorts are not particularly smart. Many of them are not unusually beautiful. Many of the successful escorts are solidly "average" in these respects. In fact, there really aren't a set of "traits" other than being crowd pleasers that make an escort successful or unsuccessful.

What there are is a set of *actions*. Actions like staying un-addicted to substances. Actions like taking reasonable precautions. Actions like doing some research before starting. Actions like taking some care with hygiene and wardrobe before appointments. Actions like writing down your appointments, and not double-booking. Basic common sense, of which frankly, the lower economic classes tend to have in at least as great abundance will carry a provider far far farther than a pretty face.
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Old 04-25-2013, 12:01 PM   #4
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Killer looks and sweetness, overly exaggerated feminine traits do it for me. Dependability and honesty are also important.
I've found my girls run the gamut from loving homes, wealth and privilege, to the classic molestation story.
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Old 04-25-2013, 02:56 PM   #5
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I don't know what it takes to be a successful provider, but I do know that I won't rely on a single study (that is, one study alone) or anecdotal evidence to find out.
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Old 04-25-2013, 02:58 PM   #6
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Dammit Zabrina! I'm going to now have to take a cold shower after reading what you have pecked away on that keyboard. You get me so turned on. I ache in my loins for you.

I have contacted you in the past on coming down to Texas. I'm reconsidering that invitation. I don't think it would be wise for you to come down because I will go broke. I won't be able to get enough of you. There is nothing more attractive than a strong beautiful woman with a mind.
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Old 04-25-2013, 06:48 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Salsa man View Post
Dammit Zabrina! I'm going to now have to take a cold shower after reading what you have pecked away on that keyboard. You get me so turned on. I ache in my loins for you.

I have contacted you in the past on coming down to Texas. I'm reconsidering that invitation. I don't think it would be wise for you to come down because I will go broke. I won't be able to get enough of you. There is nothing more attractive than a strong beautiful woman with a mind.

Yes there is, but I want her to come anyway!!
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