Review: The Deep Distaste for Denny's now!!

[The Chelsea Stone]

Date: 12/09/2012
Hobbyist: tjs8488
Phone: will provide after screening
Email Address: -
URL / Website:
http://www.eccie.net/member.php?userid=8965
City: The Dirty Dirty D!!
State: Texas
Address: Hoe Central.. Denny's
Appointment Type: Outcall
Did the Appointment take place at the agreed-upon time?: Yes
Activities: Ball Scratching, nose picking, burping, farting, an occasional shart, sarcasm, and a crap load of spitting
Session Length: 2 hrs
Fee: priceless
Hair Length and Color: grey, short, brushed real neat
Age: who knows.. he's a liar!
Smoking Status: Not hot!!
Ethnic Background: He comes from this way that way.. and i think a little bit of those too!

Physical Description: Tall.. but than again compared to me most are. A bit of a cynic.. he didn't sag but I got an eyeful of boxers all morning! He just couldn't keep his pants on! And we were in public.. just tasteless

[ROS]The Rest of the Story:

I knew it was going to be a strange one! We have been talking for awhile now.. He mentioned he was going to Denny's the one he was referring to was near my incall.. he PM'd me and asked if i would like to join, I said sure as long as he dug in those never ending pockets and gave me what i wanted.. which wasn't but 9 dollars for a cold beverage and some hot food.. who could deny something as simple as that.. Well he was just down right AWFUL... As soon as we sit down i hear him ripping them like tight pants squeezing a big girl booty! The smell was god awful i thought my nose hairs were falling out!

He finally stopped letting loose long enough for us to be able to order.. it was raining outside and it was raining inside.. with every word he spoke i was getting drenched in his spit! I felt like i was taking a shower in the stench of week old brautwurst and beans. I just knew from this point on it just couldn't get any worse and for the sake of my sanity i was hoping it wouldn't.. SPOKE TOO SOON

The food comes out and what does he do?? Unbottons his pants undoes his belt and scratches his balls for what has to be 25 mins.. It was like being in a room surrounded by chalk boards.. and the long nails of your 57 yr old math teacher running across them to get your attention.. I swore i could feel my ears bleeding.. I don't know if it was the lack of shower or his balls were chaffing from the cold air.. but they were so crusty they were dropping flakes all over the ground.. I knew i ordered my food for no reason.. cause this my friends had made me hurl inside my mouth.. Being polite i excused myself so i could relieve myself of this god awful taste in my throat..

As i return back from the restroom he has proceeded to eat all his food.. half my plate and order another plate and is 1/4 done with that.. Asking for compensation for the ratio of my plate he ate he replies with the worst thing i have ever heard.. "You crusty dusty hoe I don't owe you shit.. What do i look like State Farm you can't just sing a jingle and get what you want goddamnit DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM! I'm the best Hobbyist around.. The best money can afford.. Ask anybody!" I was floored just floored.. I almost thought i couldn't reach myself to get back up.. This was just the beginning..

As we come to the completion of our meal he asks me "So your gonna get this right?" Like HELLLLO! I decided i had had enough at this point, fed up with this guy from the beginning i decided to lay it on the line.. "Look her guy, DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM I CHELSEA STONE I HAVE 28 REVIEWS ALL AMAZING YOU CAN'T MESS WITH ME! YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT SCRATCH YOUR BALLS ALL DAY! You could at least have the decency to tuck your balls in, pull out your wallet and fork over the green! And i don't mean your snot bubbles" This just was not my morning!

But i was already there i should have left but i couldn't i just couldn't bring myself to cut it short.. Something was keeping me there and it wasn't the constant boogers landing in my hair from his nose, was this guy seriously flicking these nasty black-green things one me! This guy just didn't know how to treat a lady..

We finally end this trainwreck and as were walking out the door he asked me "Hey yeah you uhm can i borrow your car i have stuff to do and i don't wanna use my car! It will only be for today don't worry i'll have it right back to you no harm done!" Oh no no no my pride and joy my baby.. no no no! I told him "I don't trust you and honestly i don't wanna see you again, and if i loan you my car, i'll have to do both!" So as im unlocking my car.. I realize why i couldn't cut it short.. my keys were locked inside.. I ask him to help me.. what does he do.. Slams his elbow through my window.. my whole left side is soaked.. I can't even explain to you what i have been through..

I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION HIS PIMP, UHHH WHAT A SCARY DUDE RIGHT THERE!! HE KEPT CALLING EVERY 5 MINS LOOKING FOR HIS MONEY! I WAS HOPING AND PRAYING HE WOULDNT SHOW UP.. IT WOULD JUST MAKE THINGS WORSE IF I GOT ROBBED AT GUNPOINT

From the horrible taste in clothing.. to the constant disregard to my smell and sight he has done nothing but make this wonderful rainy day, a day i just want to drink away.. If only i drank.. and was old enough to buy liquor


Recommendation: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING ME THIS!!!! WTF.. AFTER ALL THE SHIT HE'S PUT ME THROUGH I WOULDN'T EVEN LET HIM SHINE MY SHOES!!

[Kayleehotchick]

First off, you should be a writer because you're awesome at it.

Second, PLEASE tell me this a FICTION!

[Sexy Summer]

I went to Ihop with him, he's an ass. Never did bcd though

[Guest112916]

He could have at least asked you to smell his fingers after he scratched his balls.

[Kayleehotchick]

Thats GROSS Von Spieler!!!! LMAO

[The Chelsea Stone]

Originally Posted by Kayleehotchick

First off, you should be a writer because you're awesome at it.

Second, PLEASE tell me this a FICTION!

Well thanks babe I do love to write. Yes it is fiction..

Originally Posted by Sexy Summer

I went to Ihop with him, he's an ass. Never did bcd though

I had a great time with him, maybe some just don't have connections

Originally Posted by Von Spieler

He could have at least asked you to smell his fingers after he scratched his balls.

Lol Von you dirty man you!

[Kayleehotchick]

Oh thank GAWD! LOL

[teejay2262]

Originally Posted by Kayleehotchick

First off, you should be a writer because you're awesome at it.

Fiction or no, I totally agree with Kaylee.

[WyldeAndromeda]

At least his photos were accurate ha ha ha and he wasn't 75lbs overweight and his photos so out of date that you wonder how it's possible they were even him at one point!

bwhahahahaha!

[The Chelsea Stone]

Originally Posted by teejay2262

Fiction or no, I totally agree with Kaylee.

Aww thank you I just love to write, I'm good with my imagination!

Originally Posted by AndyWylde

At least his photos were accurate ha ha ha and he wasn't 75lbs overweight and his photos so out of date that you wonder how it's possible they were even him at one point!

bwhahahahaha!

Lol it was him.. No beer belly.. just hanging balls

[tjs8488]

http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=641669

[Guest112916]

I see now Chelsea. We had a 10:30 am appt for yesterday. I arrived at the hotel for my 10:30am appt only to be NCNS by you because you were busy with itchy & scratchy at Dennys? I almost went in there for breakfast to wait for you. Guess I'd have found you there.

Good thing I didn't feel the need to write a NCNS in CO-ED.

[Guest112916]

Originaly Posted by Von Spieler - Good thing I didn't feel the need to write a NCNS in CO-ED.

oh wait...I just did.

[LucadeJure]

Kudos to The Chelsea Stone ... writing is such good therapy ... and this is some excellent writing.

And the rebuttal by tjs8488 is priceless.

Let this be a lesson gents ... how would a review of us from the lady's perspective read.

[OldGrump]

Aww, the poor guy just doesn't like to eat alone. It sounds like he should get used to it.

Great review.