Had a question for both sides, maybe a bit more for the ladies, but know that both parties have dealt with this so curious>>>

[Ez5417]

I was wondering, many of you have dealt with enemies, frenemies, and weirdos who simply can't get off your nuts, IE posting almost immediately after you post. More often than not, focused on always disagreeing or putting in their 2 cents when it's clearly unnecessary. Now of course, many would assume its just coincidence, but after quite a few posts you begin to realize, it's clear there's a bit of a stalker agenda there. Lol.

I'm talking, in all sections, all threads, even In different cities, you seem to be passive aggressively ruffled, usually this being a result of a major fight, or incident. My question is, besides just being real cool about letting it roll off your back, blocking, ignoring etc::: how have you reacted? Any specific stories out there?

I know many ladies have had this w certain men, vice versa, and of course same sex stalking ordeals as well.

At first it's not really phasing you, but after a while, initially, you just begin to see red and you want to call them out, privately or publicly, or just be immature and feed right into it w recriprocating tactics. Lol. However, it's inevitable it'll become one big fiasco.

So what is your take on this? Opinions? Pointers?

And this is just to say, hypothetically, it's a GIVEN the passive aggressive harassment ( some may think it's not) IS indeed happening, and it's obviously not coincidental.

How have some of yal handled it? Or how would you handle it?
Again, if you didn't want to just sit back and press mute.

Another variable: what if the person was extremely difficult , was driven by constant drama, and even if they weren't very bright at arguing, never the less had no limits, and was extremely volatile w no end?

Was just curious about this certain predicament, and would greatly appreciate any and all stories, reactions, consequential reactions on both ends, and of course if willing, many of your personal POVs.

Thanks for taking the time.

[Guest083013]

.....Ezra ==> consider the source and never let them get in your head because its like you are letting them live in there "rent free"

.....what is always interesting to me is that many times with the guys it is someone using a new handle; however, they forget to change their mannerisms, the things they bring up from the past, the smart alec retorts that they believe many of us won't recognize, and last but not least ===> they use the same grammar and punctuations within their "new'(sic?) attempted personnas

you ladies have it down to a "T" and I love watching some of you playing them for what they are which you have graciously addressed above.....

honestly - I have one female and two males (will not refer to them as a woman and man, lady and gentleman) on my "ignore" list and life is grand!!

[Ms. Milani]

I'm thankful that has never happened to me because being a hormonal pregnant woman it might not end well. I honestly don't know what to say. I'm a pretty laid back person most of the time. Although I do get angry every now and then. It's immature for someone to be doing that to your posts. I honestly have no idea who it is because I can barely remember what everyone posts. I'd just say lay back and make them look like the fool. Take the higher ground. And the ignore list is awesome too.

[Ez5417]

Thanks for the input guys. And yes Malaya, it is most definitely immature, but sometimes, ill definitely admit, I'll want to stoop to their level and just tear em a new one. Lmao.

But you're right, I've noticed w others, that the idea of lying back and letting them make a fool of themselves is pretty successful. Especially, when and if 99% of the posts are highly unintelligent, inarticulate, and a bit ignorant. Lol. Of course I get, that grammar and spelling is not important here. I screw up plenty of times, but I meant basic logic and diarreah of the mouth, as a general sense of stupidity. Lol.

Thx for your POV.

[SAtexas]

Ezra,

the main thing about a board like this is the sense of anonymity that comes behind a handle. In most cases a lot of these people never meet each other. So going onto a forum such as this and being able to spout just about anything you want is easier because you can’t see that person across from you that you are insulting or making accusations about. It is the empowering (not in a good sense) for some people and they then use it to slam and smear people without having any fear of being called out or being known in public as an ass.

[Ez5417]

Originally Posted by SAtexas

Ezra,

the main thing about a board like this is the sense of anonymity that comes behind a handle. In most cases a lot of these people never meet each other. So going onto a forum such as this and being able to spout just about anything you want is easier because you can’t see that person across from you that you are insulting or making accusations about. It is the empowering (not in a good sense) for some people and they then use it to slam and smear people without having any fear of being called out or being known in public as an ass.

I totally agree w you. But this one, I know. Very well. And again, many derive from initial attachments, friendships, relationships etc. seeing said people face to face is close to inevitable of the next future weeks, months, years. Blegh.

( oh! And to elaborate, I don't mean because sessions will be involved) lol. I'm sure most would never actually agree to seeing said stalker after the passive aggressive behavior. Heck to the no. Lol.

[Mokoa]

Rule 17 of the Forum Guidelines is quite clear about the behavior you describe, Ezra...

#17 - "Cyber Stalking" is a term that refers to the act of following another member around online. This may include persistent PMing of the other party, repeated ISOs about the other party, or excessive bumping of reviews or posting in threads about the other individual, whether it be positive or negative information posted. In any of these cases, whether staff deems that the behavior has crossed the line into cyber-stalking, or the "stalked" party complains to staff about the alleged behavior, staff will take the necessary steps to make it stop. Please avoid becoming involved in this type of conduct.

If you detect a pattern use the icon to report all posts that make up the pattern to the Staff and it will be addressed.

[Sonya Playmate]

I say "ingore" it we all have the blocking button also. Don't let the little things bother you. Sorry, you have to deal with it ezra. Hope you have a better day.

[Guest041315]

That is just plain creepy and I think it definitely borders on stalking. Be very cautious luv.

[The Rover]

I would just hit the RTM button if you have proof this is occurring . Let the mods take care of it .

[Likinikki]

Ezra, through the years, I've learned to *pick and choose* my battles. That's why I changed my avatar to my Ninja Kitty! (lol) Some battles are honorable, and worth the battle scars...but, the majority are dealing with EPIC FAILURES that are just exhausting, childish, and futile!

Whoever is doing that to you, is obviously unstable, and symptomatic of some type of personality disorder. When you think about it...it's truly SAD...that they think it's attractive to be self-destructive, and void of any sense of responsibility or remorse.

The best thing you can do is become indifferent... because Drama Queens need DRAMA, and feed on the negative attention. If you don't, they'll be posting right under you again, or starting some thread...about how wonderful they are!!

[Jten13]

This isn't the place for love and some guys need to realize that and let the providers provide. It gets confusing when everyone has to change names Bc of stalkers. I even develop some emotion for the girls but I'm way to busy to stalk. Hell I just want an appointment. Start warning mokoa when you see it happen maybe we can weed out the cyber stalkers

[Ez5417]

Originally Posted by Mokoa

Rule 17 of the Forum Guidelines is quite clear about the behavior you describe, Ezra...


If you detect a pattern use the icon to report all posts that make up the pattern to the Staff and it will be addressed.

Oooo, Ty Mokoa, I will be makin notes and sending them off soon. Ty babe for the back up and info support. We are lucky to have you!!

[Ez5417]

Originally Posted by Sonya Playmate

I say "ingore" it we all have the blocking button also. Don't let the little things bother you. Sorry, you have to deal with it ezra. Hope you have a better day.

Ty Sonia, I truly appreciate such mature support. I'm super appreciative. I mean that. Hopefully, the stalking dies soon. Lol.

[Ez5417]

Originally Posted by Likinikki

Ezra, through the years, I've learned to *pick and choose* my battles. That's why I changed my avatar to my Ninja Kitty! (lol) Some battles are honorable, and worth the battle scars...but, the majority are dealing with EPIC FAILURES that are just exhausting, childish, and futile!

Whoever is doing that to you, is obviously unstable, and symptomatic of some type of personality disorder. When you think about it...it's truly SAD...that they think it's attractive to be self-destructive, and void of any sense of responsibility or remorse.

The best thing you can do is become indifferent... because Drama Queens need DRAMA, and feed on the negative attention. If you don't, they'll be posting right under you again, or starting some thread...about how wonderful they are!!

My love,

You hit it right on the head!!! Ty for taking the time to hear me out the other night and in this thread. What you said about this certain situation is spot on, and am feeling more relieved by the minute. You have no clue how much I appreciate you being my wing woman.

I have to say, despite the predicament, the good frm this site far outweighs the sick sad bad. Lol.

Ty for all of the advice. I definitely see a lot less red, and will be Nippin this in the bud.