i've rec'd a few pvt msgs in my days. one not too long ago said "why havent we met??"
not even a hello or "hi, i'm so-and-so and have been reading your posts."
kind of reminds me of the strippers who plop down in your lap and immediately ask you "do you wanna a danece?" or "you gonna buy me a drink"
jumping straight to that question is one of my buzzkillers.
so, when i do get one and it's nicely worded, what do i do?
Quote:
Originally Posted by HoustonMilfDebbie
... I would at least answer her pm. ... I have pm'd a couple of times ... When I don't get at least a response, I think it's rude! It only takes a minute to respond to an email.
... It's the courteous thing to do.
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it's not a matter of time or convenience. it has to do w/ courtesy.
dont assume they can or will respond. but welcome it if they do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by cmorc
.... My response is usually that I'm flattered by her interest, but at this point in my life have chosen to limit myself to the few wonderful ladies that are currently in my "inner circle" and have trusted me enough to be included in theirs. And leave it with that. If you want to leave a door open and say if anything changes you'll be the first to call her......but don't say it if you don't mean it. Honesty (even if the truth is edited a bit to reduce harm) is always the best path to take IMHO.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bmoore
... But I just say, "Thanks so much, but I already have something set up with another provider. Thanks for the reply!" Simple, polite, and nobody gets angry.
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what's your batting average on that?? seriously!!
i've learned to never, and i mean
NEVER, tell one provider you are thinking about going to or are planning to visit another provider!!!!!
unless she's coming over to join you two after the first shot, first 30 mins, first hour, whatever. :^)
she might feel embarassed, pissed, upset, jealous, determined to meet you, etc.
not necessarily what you want, esp if you dont want to add her to your gcho list.
a long-time friend of mine is a counselor for teens, families, couples, etc.
he told me something long ago that i've found very useful for when in a negotiation, argument or a resolution process.
keep your answers short and sweet and to the point.
tell them what you want or dont want, or are willing to do or not do. [you also say how you feel - the "I" statements. but feelings are not initially important in this sub-culture]
dont go into specifics about your answer.
you'll just give the person something to attack and use to whittle down your argument and get you to do what they want.
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnnylongcaulking
I find the easiest way to say "Thanks but no thanks" is to simply say, "Thanks but no thanks." That's just me though. I'm a dick.
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so, like johnny, i keep it short and sweet. [no, not my dick!!! :^]
and if i am a wee bit interested, i wont burn my bridge to her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Ze~
How about telling her you've already made a commitment.
Or that you have found what you are looking for?
along with -
Thanks for the consideration.
etc.
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the last one, yes, the first two, no. based on the advice given to me long ago that i described above.
Turning down a provider
My Bio Page - Texas - Dallas
