Email/PM communication

[guest061212]

I am wondering about how others (both sides) conduct email and PM communication. I have some providers who I have seen before who are very friendly via email/PM and other who are not. I am just talking about cordiality and friendliness. One hobbiest stated it this way "you ask three questions and get three answers". They don't start their email with a " Hey Mark". These are providers that are very nice BCD. I don't send disrespectful or vulgar email either. I may put something like " the new pics look great". I am a little put off by this. Is there another aspect that I am not seeing?

[guest043013-2]

Repeat after me: This is a business for the ladies.

There are some ladies who are very cordial in communications. However, they get lots of communications. They are trying to earn a living. If you are emailing them to discuss the lighting and camera angles in their last photo shoot, you are not offering to do their next photo shoot for free, and you aren't asking them to for some pay for play time, then they need to skip down to someone who is offering to put food on their table, a roof over their head, and electricity to their laptop so they can find the next guy who wants to pay some bills.

Most will give you a curt but quick reply. They reserve the longer replies to inquiries they think will lead to new or repeat business.

[Guest081013-1]

I will talk to anyone on the phone.. that I have seen BCD... including you MARK. Hey, btw, when are you coming back dang it?

Anyways... phone is best if I've seen you before... or you can shoot over an email.
First time clients, never seen before, can call... but, I'll just tell them to hang up and email me from handle. I just like to make sure they are who they say they are.

[guest061212]

TC- I completely agree with you. However I was inquiring about a return to the DFW area after touring so I could plan accordingly even stating that I owed a nice tip for staying so long over from last time.

Amber- That is why You are my fav. Seeing your pic reminded me it has been tooo long

[JDNorthface]

Generally a lady will state in her showcase or on her website what her communication preferences are. Be sure to follow those as I'm sure you have. And you mentioned your communications are short and cordial. That's important as well. Sounds like you're doing what needs to be done. Beyond that, you have every right to expect that communication to be responded to promptly and courteously. Yes, you're right, it should be somewhat personalized. Regrettably, you'll find a number of these ladies who don't understand that many truly desirable clients, who are looking for regular ATF's to visit, expect prompt, courteous, and personal replies. It's part of what we call TCB--taking care of business. Not always, but as a general rule, the ladies who have true TCB skills find themselves with a more stable and satisfied clientele. The one's with lesser TCB skills give off a sort of, "I'm busy so if you want to screw me here are the rules. Now take a number and get in line" kind of vibe.

PM's are good for flirting. Emails are good for making arrangements. Some gentlemen also use IM for setting up appointments. Again, it's the ladies choice but it's your right to expect good TCB.

All the best.

[Waldo P. Emerson-Jones]

I gotta agree with Tigercat. I've heard lots of complaints about guys that just want to chat and be friends or just want to ask questions, but never seem to schedule appointments. The ladies have names for these guys--time wasters and tire kickers. I'm not saying that you're one of those guys, but just something to consider.

[bigdog0311]

I do not PM a provider unless I am interested in setting an appointment. That session may not be something I want to do that day or even that week, but I PM to let them know I am interested, and not to BS or be their friend or anything else.

[guest061212]

Originally Posted by bigdog0311

I do not PM a provider unless I am interested in setting an appointment. That session may not be something I want to do that day or even that week, but I PM to let them know I am interested, and not to BS or be their friend or anything else.

I understand why you would contact a provider. Assuming you have seen her with in the last month, does it matter to you how she responds?
Example:
YOU: Hey Tina can we get together tomorrow at 5pm? I'd love to see you.
TINA: Fine


Would that matter to you?

[bigdog0311]

Originally Posted by markpillsbury

I understand why you would contact a provider. Assuming you have seen her with in the last month, does it matter to you how she responds?
Example:
YOU: Hey Tina can we get together tomorrow at 5pm? I'd love to see you.
TINA: Fine


Would that matter to you?

yes it matters greatly how she responds, if she responds at all, cuz many do not, and that is fine. I generally give the provider a day to respond to my initial PM, in you scenario above, then I would see right away, with the old, "one word response" all I am is a number or wallet to Tina, and that would be the end of our conversation.

Normally, I exchange several PMs and get a "feel" for her response level and such.

[guest061212]

I would see right away, with the old, "one word response" all I am is a number or wallet to Tina, and that would be the end of our conversation.

YES. You have articulated exactly what I was feeling. It seems some providers are like that and others are not. I wasn't sure if that is acceptable in the hobby world since I am relatively new with less than 10 providers seen.

[Guest030824]

I keep in touch with several providers and if they think I am wasting their time I would hope they would in a nice way tell me. Emails are best as either one of us can answer when we want. A phone call may interfere with what they are doing as I feel the same.

[Guest020617-1]

I would not judge too harshly. It might be a matter of responding from a phone or other smart device while driving, just to pull a single example off the top of my head. There are SOOO many reputable providers who don't respond at all, that any response should be appreciated.

Woody

[JDNorthface]

Originally Posted by bigdog0311

yes it matters greatly how she responds, if she responds at all, cuz many do not, and that is fine. I generally give the provider a day to respond to my initial PM, in you scenario above, then I would see right away, with the old, "one word response" all I am is a number or wallet to Tina, and that would be the end of our conversation.

Normally, I exchange several PMs and get a "feel" for her response level and such.

Same here. I don't agree that PM's are only "for business talk." I use PM's and emails to establish a "social compatibility" with a lady. I don't try to establish friendships this way and I don't abuse the privilege (because I don't have much time for chit-chat myself). But a lady who won't respond at all or responds curtly without some basic courtesies is simply someone to whom I will never be attracted nor with whom I'll ever do business.

Nor do I give even the slighted consideration to the argument that these ladies "receive so many messages per day that they can't respond to them properly--or at all." Most professionals from every walk of life receive hundreds of communications per day. Professionalism is about learning how to manage them. Calls are meant to be returned; PM's acknowledged; and emails responded to--all in a courteous, timely fashion. To do otherwise is nothing but rude.

[vnurse]

Wow, this has certainly been a very informative thread for me!

I can't tell you the number of times I have received emails or phone calls or texts from new gentlemen who are thinking about seeing me that have been (What I thought) very overly appreciative that I would even take a minute or two to chat with them!

When they have thanked me for spending time with them, I always thought it a bit out of the ordinary but now it's all clear.

I guess I'm old school but a little kindness never hurts!

Now, I HAVE had situations where someone will call and talk and call and talk and so on and so on. If they never even ATTEMPT to book an appointment, I cut conversations to a minimum but I try to NEVER be rude!

Wow...

[B.Wayne]

Yes it is nice when they communicate back. Especially if they are popular and busy. But as another poster said, if it is becoming too much when I email/contact her I definately want to know. I am pretty easygoing and being new sometimes I need to know things at the moment but its how you approach it that is important I think. I have been very lucky. And I appreciate that, and the wonderful women I have gotten to know.